Why did I decide to sit here and write a running blog of this seemingly pointless MNF game between the Seahawks and the 49ers? Good question and I got several answers.
First and foremost, practice. It’s no big mystery that I’m a huge fan of Bill Simmons so it only makes sense I would try and emulate him. I did it with Jordan and Agassi and now it’s with the Sports Guy. Hopefully this one goes a bit better for me than the former two did.
The beauty of fantasy football. What may seem to be a worthless game to most carries a lot of weight to me. My fantasy team, Brady’s Bunch, is currently riding a four game losing streak and is sitting at 3-6. Realistically I need to win out in order to make the playoffs. Thanks to Peyton Manning’s six (that’s right six) interceptions I trail Jared’s Flintstone Kid squad by 17 points entering MNF. I have 49ers TE Vernon Davis, Seattle kicker Josh Brown and the entire Seahawks defense. Jared has Seattle WR Bobby Engram. Should come right down to the wire. Frickin’ Peyton Manning. I think he needs to do another commercial. Anyways, moving on.
Lastly, I’m going to end up sitting on the couch watching this game anyways so I might as well try to do something productive. (I do have laundry going currently so hopefully I don’t miss Emmitt Smith quoting Jimmy V.)
Giddy up.
8:04 p.m. - Like I needed another reason to love Steve Young. When asked by Mike Greenberg if Peyton Manning’s awful game last night was just a matter of “every QB having a bad game here and there,” Steve shouted back, “I never threw more than three INT’s in a game, so be careful with ‘every QB.’” I’ve said it before and I’m sure I’ll say it again, I’ll take Tom Brady any day.
8:06 p.m. - I wish there was a way I could just use a CTRL _ to put in the time. Oh well. I gave Brady’s Bunch a great pre-game speech before tonight’s contest. I mentioned about how whatever happened in the past is forgotten. We can start all over tonight with a win. Keys will be keeping Engram out of the end zone, one TD catch from Davis, 10 points from Brown and the Seattle defense forcing some turnovers or maybe even scoring a special teams touchdown. It’s not a crazy scenario and a part of me actually likes my chances, which in turn scares me.
8:11 p.m. - I’m backing Marcus Trufant in the 2nd annual Monday night fishing toss contest. No way Brain Russell is winning this.
8:15 p.m. - Deion Branch won last year’s fishing toss contest between Seattle WR’s. This year they decided to go with the Seattle secondary. Deon Grant defeated Jordan Babineaux in a surprisingly exciting event which might outshine the actual game itself.
8:17 p.m. - Tom Jackson and Emmitt both declared the reason Shaun Alexander isn’t having a great season is because he got “paid.” Wow. Yeah, it has nothing to do with the fact that running backs only last four years, or the fact that he lost his fullback Mack Strong. Did I forget to mention that his offensive line is depleted as well? Yeah, go with the money angle. Thank goodness Chris Berman is there to say everything that I just wrote.
8:20 p.m. - ESPN’s Rachel Nichols just told us that Seattle QB Matt Hasselbeck plans on using a towel to wipe his hands regardless if it rains or not. Glad you’re here Rachel.
8:22 p.m. - Wanted to give my condolences to Mike Nolan’s family. His father Dick, a former NFL head coach, passed away Sunday. I hope ESPN doesn’t go overkill on this. As the Beatles so eloquently put it, “Let it Be.”
8:29 p.m. - The spread for this contest is Seattle by ten. If they cover then I have the best record in our pick’em league. If the 49ers pull it off then Barnes and I will tie for week ten. Just another reason to be excited for this NFC West battle.
8:31 p.m. - This whole Hank Williams Jr. pre-game song and dance is getting a bit much. As Dr. Evil put it, “Honestly people.”
8:32 p.m. - No more than ten seconds in and we have a reference to Mike Nolan’s dad. I’m fine with this if they drop it right here.
8:33 p.m. - Frank Gore is back this week. A top 5 fantasy draft pick at the beginning of the season, he has been a bust so far. I’m hoping he keeps up this pace for the sake of my Seattle pick.
8:36 p.m. - Suzy Kolber is sporting the mullet look tonight. She looks better with Joe Namaith on her.
8:37 p.m. - Jim Mora Jr. who was just described as a “fiery motivator,” played an interview of Tiger Woods on 60 Minutes to get Seattle pumped up. Why wouldn’t he just bring in his old man? Playoffs?!?!?
8:40 p.m. - Drew Carey just raised the “12th Man” flag. Apparently he is a part owner of the new MLS franchise in Seattle. Sounds like a set-up for a Family Guy episode.
8:41 p.m. - Brady’s Bunch takes the lead 79-76 with the Seattle defense getting the early 20 points. Just stop the game now.
8:43 p.m. - Alex Smith just overthrew Yao Ming by about 10 feet. 49ers go three and out and I hope Engram forgot his stick-um.
8:44 p.m. - First play for Seattle, 12 yard pass to Engram. He is going to be haunting my dreams tonight.
8:47 p.m. - Time for some of Maxine’s chip dip, I‘ll be back in a bit. If you’ve never had it before imagine your favorite food and then multiply it by infinity. Seriously, it’s the real deal.
8:51 p.m. - Switched from the desk to the couch. If I’m going to watch this whole game I’m going to be comfortable. Hasselbeck is just flinging the ball downfield on every play.
8:54 p.m. - 3rd and 7 on the Niners 12. Need Josh Brown to kick an early field goal. Niners stop the Seahawks but then get a cheap roughing the passer call. Should have been three points for Brown, now it might be six points for Engram. Such is my life.
9:00 p.m. - Hasselbeck throws a touchdown pass to … Will Heller. Josh Brown tacks on the extra point and the Seahawks take an early 7-0 lead. Brady’s Bunch is up 80-77. Time for Vernon Davis to do something with his life.
9:04 p.m. - Alex Smith introduces the Niners offense and calls Vernon Davis, “The Turk.” That is the best thing Alex Smith has done for me yet. Oh wait, he just got sacked AND fumbled. Score one(or three) for the good guys. 83-77 B.B.
9:09 p.m. - Seattle fails on 3rd and 1 from the Niners four yard line. Bring in Josh Brown baby.
9:10 p.m. - Brown does his thing putting the Seahawks up ten and Brady’s Bunch up nine (86-77).
9:12 p.m. - Seattle’s stadium looks awesome from the blimp at night. If it wasn’t for the rain and the movie ‘Sleepless In Seattle’ I might actually want to go there one day.
9:15 p.m. - The Turk gets some action but only due to offensive pass interference and then a false start penalty on back-to-back plays.
9:17 p.m. - These 49ers are pathetic. Another false start brings up 1st and 30. It’s a shame they gave their first round draft pick to the Patriots. Unreal.
9:24 p.m. - End of 1st quarter and it’s time for me to fold the second of three loads of laundry. Don’t act like you’re not impressed.
9:40 p.m. - Back after laundry and surprise surprise, didn’t miss much. Engram caught two more passes and now has 46 yards receiving. Josh Brown had a 46 yard field goal negated due to a holding penalty. Seattle just punted and pinned the 49ers on the one yard line. Sounds like a 99 yard touchdown pass to The Turk.
9:45 p.m. - Direct snap to Arnaz Battle on third down didn’t work. Any sentence which includes Battle usually ends with “didn’t work.” Six minutes left in the 1st half and the 49ers have 32 total yards and zero first downs. I just gave myself a pat on the back for the Seattle Defense pick-up (Pats on bye).
9:49 p.m. - 48 yard pass from Hasselbeck to … D.J. Hackett. I’m pulling a Phil Hellmuth and dodging bullets right now.
9:50 p.m. - Maurice Morris does something Shaun Alexander hasn’t done in over a month and rushes four yards for a touchdown. Josh Brown tacks on the PAT and the Seahawks take a 17-0 lead. In the score that really matters B.B. has an 87-80 lead.
9:55 p.m. - Tony Kornheiser does a Howard Cosell impersonation and Julian Peterson sacks Alex Smith. By the way, I actually don’t mind this MNF crew (minus the sideline reporters of course). The 49ers are so bad they can’t even get a punt off without a delay of game penalty.
10:03 p.m. - The 49ers are going to have great field position with just under two minutes to go. After a fair catch interference penalty, they sit on the Seahawks 31 yard line. The Turk can smell the end zone.
10:04 p.m. - Another sack, another fumble, another turnover. No wonder Barnes quit being a 49ers fan.
10:06 p.m. - The 49ers are trying to set a record for the worst first half performance in the NFL. While trying to spike the ball to stop the clock the Seahawks catch San Francisco with 12 guys on the field. Bring out Josh Brown from 49 yards. Brown makes it, but AGAIN there’s another penalty on Seattle. Brown is now trying it from 54 yards, and of course, he misses it. This Seattle field goal unit is killing me. Six points they have taken away from me.
10:10 p.m. - End of half - Seattle 17, San Francisco 0 … Brady’s Bunch 89, Flintstone’s Kid 80.
Halftime thoughts - Instead of commenting on the halftime festivities, I’m taking this time to talk about other festivities.
The Cleveland Browns blew another lead against the Pittsburgh Steelers. Reminded me of the Lou Brown comment in ‘Major League’. “One of these days we’re going to figure out how to beat those guys [Yankees].” Same concept here. Close but not quite yet. Not all is lost however for the Brownies. They are sitting at 5-4 and more than likely will actually be favored in their remaining seven games. Realistically they should end up somewhere around 10-6. That should be good enough for an AFC Wild Card berth. Time will tell.
Derek Anderson has been playing well but was below average in the 2nd half last week in Pittsburgh. Here is what the Browns SHOULD do with D.A. His contract is up at the end of the season and the Browns should exercise the team option and resign him. However, upon doing so, other teams will be able to try and trade for Derek Anderson but will HAVE to give the Browns a 1st and a 3rd round draft pick. This allows Cleveland a chance to get back in the 1st round of the draft. Also, if another team does not make a stab at D.A then you have him and Brady doing battle in training camp at the start of next season. Sounds like a win-win there.
Cleveland needs somebody on defense. Willie McGinist showed his age last week in a game where the Browns badly missed D’Qwell Jackson. Phil Savage addressed the offensive line and now needs to address the entire defense via the draft and through free agency.
I’m loving it when Romeo smiles. The world seems like a happier place to live in when he breaks out into a smile.
The Chicago Bulls have always been slow starters but my goodness. They lost by thirty at home against the Raptors. Unacceptable. I said last year that this team has “maxed out” their potential. They can only get so good with their current roster. They need to get Kobe ASAP.
10:24 p.m. - Back to the game. Give credit to the 49ers for trying something creative and kicking an onside kick to start the 2nd half. Unfortunately it didn’t work and the Seahawks take over from midfield.
10:28 p.m. - Maurice Morris does his best Shaun Alexander impression and fumbles. The 49ers show some sign of life and jump on the ball. Will The Turk catch a pass?? Stay tuned.
10:29 p.m. - Suzy Kolber’s hair is ridiculous. Somewhere Joe Namaith is laughing. He’s probably wasted, but he’s laughing nonetheless.
10:33 p.m. - Arnaz Battle tries to draw Seattle off-sides on 4th down and, well, I direct you to 9:45. Same story.
10:36 p.m. - It just wouldn’t be a game without a Matt Hasselbeck INT. Seattle has turned the ball over on their last two possessions. Nate Clements picks it off and returns it to Seattle’s 20. Frank Gore runs up the middle for ten yards. The Turk is ready to do some work.
10:39 p.m. - 4th and a yard from Seattle’s 2. I’m guessing San Francisco is going to go for it. At this point they have absolutely nothing to lose.
10:42 p.m. - The Niners go for it, and don’t get is as Frank Gore is stuffed in the backfield. Well, at least the 49ers are trying. They are failing, but trying.
10:43 p.m. - I just made an executive decision and decided to leave the 3rd load of laundry in the dryer until the game is over. Realistically that means I could have folded the clothes about an hour ago, but I’m more of a technical person.
10:46 p.m. - The Seahawks go three and out and are forced to punt. For the third consecutive time, the 49ers start with great field position, this time at Seattle’s 40. Drew Carey is joining the crew after the TV timeout. He better say something about Cleveland.
10:50 p.m. - We got the Cleveland Browns reference. That’s all I needed. Go Browns.
10:51 p.m. - 4th and 3 from Seattle’s 22 and the 49ers decide to go for it. Strange decision at best from Mike Nolan. Smith’s pass is incomplete and the Niners waste great field position for the 3rd time in the quarter.
10:55 p.m. - God awards His people. Three solid minutes of discussing Cleveland sports with Drew Carey. I would have missed that entire conversation if I wasn’t doing this running blog. Everything happens for a reason. Fan-tastic.
11:01 p.m. - Out goes Drew Carey and into the red zone goes the Seahawks. An Engram TD would make the next half hour way too stressful. End of third quarter. Seattle 17, San Francisco 0 … Brady’s Bunch 87, Flintstone’s Kid 80. One more quarter.
11:04 p.m. - Hasselbeck throws a TD pass to … D.J Hackett. That one made me jump a bit. Great pass by Hasselbeck. Josh Brown gives me another point and the Seahawks give me the best week ten record in our pick’em league. “Show me the money!”
11:07 p.m. - For some reason Steve Young is now in the booth. Does this happen every week? I’m willing to bet Steve is tired of listening to Emmitt.
11:08 p.m. - I’m convinced that The Turk is not going to catch a pass. Alex Smith is just downright awful right now.
11:09 p.m. - Arnaz Battle tries to catch a 3rd down pass and … you get the idea.
11:12 p.m. - Bobby Engram catches his fourth pass, this one going for only six yards. However, it’s another point for Jared’s team. 88-81 with just 12:30 to go.
11:16 p.m. - Seattle has 26 first downs … San Francisco has 4. Enough said.
11:20 p.m. - Seattle is going to punt with eight minutes to go. I need to avoid big plays by San Francisco that don’t involve The Turk in order for Brady’s Bunch to snap a four game losing streak.
11:23 p.m. - Notre Dame’s basketball team has as many wins as N.D’s football team. Alex Smith tries to hit The Turk but throws it six feet short. Smith needs bigger hands.
11:28 p.m. - Mark it down. The Turk comes through with his first catch of the game!! Reception goes for four yards. He needs at least six more yards to get me a point. The 49ers have strung a couple of plays together and now my fantasy score is 86-81. 6:13 to go.
11:30 p.m. - Arnaz Battle drops a third down pass, tries to get a pass interference call and, well, I don’t think I have to tell you how it ended.
11:36 p.m. - Another job for a promising broadcaster just got taken away when Mack Strong said he was pursuing a broadcasting career. That’s how it works. Seattle is punting with just under three minutes to play. I did some quick math and here’s how I can lose: San Francisco must score a TD and get 89 total yards. I like my chances.
11:40 p.m. - Mike Tirico points out that Alex Smith was a winner in high school. Smith just happened to have a running back named Reggie Bush on his team. I wonder if that helped at all?
11:44 p.m. - San Francisco turns the ball over on downs and Seattle takes over at the two-minute warning. The Seahawks are now in victory formation which means Brady’s Bunch earned a hard fought victory, improving to 4-6 on the season. The playoffs are still possible. Thanks for caring.
11:45 p.m. - Ron Jaworski is counting down the number of days until he gets to call a New England Patriots game. I feel bad for this crew. They deserve better. However, I’m not going to cry too much about it because Gus Johnson deserves much better than what he gets.
11:46 p.m. - Ball game over. Seattle shuts out San Francisco 24-0. Seattle goes to 5-4 while the 49ers have lost seven in a row and are now at 2-7. It’s been real.
We’ve had the Beatles, Dr. Evil, Sleepless In Seattle, chip dip, The Turk, laundry, countless number of rips on Arnaz Battle, Major League, a Cuba Gooding Jr. quote, Gus Johnson, a mullet, Drew Carey, Joe Namaith and a fishing toss contest.
Welcome to the life of a running blog. You never know where it’s going to take you.
Until next time, “read it, roll it, hole it.”
Monday, November 12, 2007
Sunday, November 11, 2007
2007 NFL Picks Week Ten
We have reached double digits. I can distinctly remember being very excited to turn double digits in age as I felt it signified the starting point of growing up. These NFL teams are doing the same thing in the sense that they are "growing" into their identity that they have attempted to establish over the previous nine weeks. Playoff talk now becomes a focus and scoreboard watching for some teams becomes a weekly habit.
In honor of this monumental occassion of reaching double digits I have decided to mix it up this week. Every participant received their own space to make comments. Instead of grouping the comments together by game, I decided to group them by the individual who made them. For one, it's a nice change of pace and two, the Browns start in one hour. Each game will have a number which will correspond to the comments. Giddy up.
Congrats to Bart for going 10-4 last week and posting the best record. For the first time all season Bart has gone over .500. Also, congrats to the league as a whole. For the first time all year, just two players are not over .500. Like I said earlier, getting through the first several weeks are difficult and this league is a testiment to that statement.
STANDINGS (after nine weeks)
1) Luke 73-57 (6-8)
2) Sara 71-59 (8-6)
3) Kevin 70-60 (9-5)
4) Devin 68-62 (6-8)
4) Jeff 68-62 (9-5)
6) Bart 66-64 (10-4)
7) Barnes 62-68 (8-6)
8) Grothaus 61-69 (7-7)
#1 - Jacksonville @ Tennessee (-4)
JAX: Devin, Grothaus
TEN: Luke, Sara, Kevin, Jeff, Bart, Barnes
#2 - Denver @ Kansas City (-3.5)
DEN: Luke, Barnes, Grothaus
KC: Sara, Kevin, Devin, Jeff, Bart
#3 - Buffalo (-3) @ Miami
BUF: Sara, Devin, Jeff, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
MIA: Luke, Kevin
#4 - Cleveland @ Pittsburgh (-9.5)
CLE: Luke, Sara, Kevin, Devin
PIT: Jeff, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
#5 - St. Louis @ New Orleans (-11.5)
STL: Luke, Jeff, Bart, Grothaus
NO: Sara, Kevin, Devin, Barnes
#6 - Atlanta @ Carolina (-4)
ATL: Luke, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
CAR: Sara, Kevin, Devin, Jeff
#7 - Philadelphia @ Washington (-3)
PHI: Luke, Sara, Jeff
WAS: Kevin, Devin, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
#8 - Minnesota @ Green Bay (-6)
MIN: Luke, Jeff, Bart, Grothaus
GB: Sara, Kevin, Devin, Barnes
#9 - Cincinnati @ Baltimore (-4.5)
CIN: Luke, Sara, Devin, Jeff, Bart, Barnes
BAL: Kevin, Grothaus
#10 - Chicago (-3.5) @ Oakland
CHI: Luke, Kevin, Jeff, Barnes, Grothaus
OAK: Sara, Devin, Bart
#11 - Dallas (-1) @ New York Giants
DAL: Kevin, Devin, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
NYG: Luke, Sara, Jeff
#12 - Detroit @ Arizona (-1)
DET: Everyone
ARI: No one
#13 - Indianapolis (-3.5) @ San Diego
IND: Everyone
SD: No one
#14 - San Francisco @ Seattle (-10)
SF: Devin, Jeff, Barnes
SEA: Luke, Sara, Kevin, Bart, Grothaus
LUKE
#1 - Jacksonville is starting Quinn Gray. QUINN GRAY ON THE ROAD!!
#3 - Buffalo is a different team on the road. Phins get their first win today.
#4 - It can not be any worse than it was way back in week one. I expect this game to be close. Fortunately for the Browns, if they lose this game it's not that big of a deal as far as AFC Wild Card hopes.
#5 - Too many points for Steven Jackson.
#6 - I know I said I would back Maxine Hunt, but come on, Carolina has NO ONE at QB.
#8 - God bless Adrian Peterson. He is unreal.
#9 - This just in: Ray Lewis does not play offense. He's my 2nd most hated athlete and all he does is keep giving me ammunition.
#11 - Should be a good game between the best the NFC has to offer. I expect the Giants to play a lot better on defense and win a close game. The typical Tom Coughlin collapse is just weeks away.
#12 - Oddsmakers still have no faith in this Lions bunch. Again, I'm nervous because it seems with this spread that they know something I don't.
#13 - Colts are too good to lose this one. Chargers have been a flaky bunch all year, kind of like their coach.
#14 - ESPN wishes they could have this pick back. Ouch.
SARA
I'd just like to say that it feels good to be back, and I'm looking forward to actually being able to watch the games on TV!!! Watch out, everyone ... especially you Luke. Now I can actually make some educated picks!! Woo hoo!! Go BROWNS!!
#4 - CAN IT GET ANY BETTER THAN THIS!?!?
#5 - This is a huge spread ... and it's awfully tempting. But no thanks, I'll take the Saints.
#10 - I like that new Justin Fargas kid as the RB.
#12 - Lions love the desert.
KEVIN
No Ballbuster Pick this week. It's been awful lately and I guess I can do just as well by actually picking. If I don't go .500 this week, it will return.
#2 - Denver is not Green Bay and, therefore, will not win at Arrowhead.
#3 - They (MIA) have to win sometime, don't they?? Might as well be at home. And I'm not talking about England. I mean, the place is called, "Wembley."
#4 - Hoping the Brownies can just keep it close.
#5 - I don't know, I just don't know...
#6 - Maxine Hunt Pick of the Week (3-1) - as made LIVE on OCR, Tuesday night. She went with Carolina because that's where she wants to go on vacation. She practically denied that she doesn't want to have a vacation in Atlanta for no real reason -- although Carolina is at home, so we'll give her a break. In other news, it's unknown whether Vinny Testaverde will play, but something tells me that if he starts, that would only make Maxine want to pick his team more.
#7 - Philly has to be one of the most ridiculous teams to watch at this point. Which is interesting for a team that scored 56 points in a game early in the year. Now they're talking about sitting Donovan McNabb for Kevin Kolb. Yikes.
#8 - Back the Pack 'cause the Pack is Back!! I'm starting to love Brett Favre almost more than John Madden. And yes, I realize how scary this really is.
#9 - As much as I hate Baltimore after that Monday Night Game, I hate the Bengals on the road even more. Recently reinstated WR Chris Henry could be the game-changer for Cincinnati, but I think he'll be rusty, at best.
#10 - Every week when I make the pick in the Oakland game, I type my answer, but call timeout in my head just before I finish it. Then I type it again. It usually ends up being the other team that I type the second time. I hate the Raiders.
#11 - Oddsmakers really want people to pick up on the Giants, I guess. I just don't trust them yet. I would rather not pick any games involving the NFC East.
#12 - Lions eat Cardinals. It's that simple. I guess the spread could be transferred into teeth in this example. So not only are cats eating birds, but the cats are getting another tooth with which to eat them. Can Detroit really win this many games??
#13 - No such thing as a hangover from losing to NE. They weren't talking about that game before it got there, they won't remember it now, either. The loss was mostly blamed on the lack of health on their team, so the Colts obviously don't care a whole lot about the regular season loss. The Chargers, meanwhile, got a beat down by Minnesota and helped the Browns exit the top slot in a bad spot inthe record books.
#14 - The Seahawks just lost to the Browns, but this season that doesn't seem like such a devastating defeat. Their problem was that they went too long with Shawn Alexander. Welcome in Maurice Morris as a starter and Seattle takes care of the 49ers. San Francisco is awful and I blame Matt Barnes and Emmitt Smith. Barnes abandoned the team and Steve Young's 49ers mojo has been all but obliterated by Emmitt Smith's being beside the former QB at the desk on ESPN. The only thing saving San Fran's year would be bulletin board material reading: Don't Quit, don't even quit.
JEFF
#1 - Titans -- not even sure about the Jags defense anymore.
#2 - KC -- yeah the Chiefs fans said their prayers - the Priest came back.
#3 - Buffalo impresses me SOMEWHAT -- Miami not at all ---- Buffalo
#4 - My heart says Browns -- my head says Steelers --- Pitt but it hurts.
#5 - St. Louis -- Jackson being back may keep Brees off the field.
#6 - Carolina -- Atlanta played well last week -- back to normal today.
#7 - Philly -- McNabb is so bad he is due for a HUGE week.
#8 - Vikings --- Peterson helps the Vikings control the clock.
#9 - Cincinnati -- yeah rooting for the Bunlgles here -- I must have a concussion.
#10 - Bears -- Raiders flopping QBs, RBs, only Janikowski "stable"?
#11 - GMEN --- I think the Giants defense will be the difference.
#12 - Detroit -- Kitna keeps em rolling.
#13 - Indy - Not a Phillip Rivers fan and Indy won't have a letdown.
#14 - SF -- only because of the points!!!!
So there you go. A new look at the picks and comments for our pick'em league. Bart chose to keep it strictly professional this week and just went with picks.
Quote of the week goes to Kevin for #14. Any time you give reference to Emmitt Smith and his absurd comments you will have a shot at quote of the week.
That's all I got for this week. Best of luck to everyone and go browns!!
"Read it, roll it, hole it."
Sunday, November 04, 2007
2007 NFL Picks Week Nine
It's hard to believe that the NFL regular season is half way over. In the next several weeks teams will try to seperate themselves from the middle of the pack to playoff contenders. In our pick'em however, there is very little seperation anywhere. Four games is the biggest gap between any two players. At the half way point it appears as if this is going to come down to the very last week.
The Grothaus Scandal of 2007 has been ruled upon. After getting feedback from the entire league, I have decided to give Grothaus three more wins which puts him in a tie for 7th place. Now if Grothaus goes on to win this thing by one or two I might have a mutiny on my hands. Staying with players in this pick'em I apologize to Mr. Normand. You are absolutely right, no more Jeff. I don't know what I was thinking. And lastly, with regards to Barnes, expect an e-mail and/or phone call sometime later today.
Okay, now that I got the business aspect of this post taken care of, I can move onto the pleasure side.
I thought it would be fitting to give half-way awards to not only the NFL players, but to players of this pick'em as well. Sit back and enjoy. The first annual Skywalker's are ready to begin.
MVP - Tom Brady. No surprise here. He is the best quarterback in the league and is on pace to throw 60 TD's and 4 INT's. He could take four weeks off and still be a sure bet for this award.
Offensive Player of the Year - See above.
Defensive Player of the Year - Osi Umenyiora. Basing this solely on one game earlier this year against the Eagles where he sacked McNabb six times.
Coach of the Year - Eric Mangini. Even though his Jets are at 1-7 he is the sole reason the Patriots are killing everyone.
Surprise Player of the Year - Derek Anderson. If the Pro Bowl started today, he would be the third QB in the AFC behind Manning and Brady. He has thrown the 2nd most TD's in the league and has the Browns sitting at 4-3.
Best Moment of the Year - Walking back from the Ravens-Browns game back in week four. It took seven tries, but I finally got to experience a Browns win. High fives and smiles from the masses was something I had never seen in Cleveland Browns Stadium.
Worst Moment of the Year - Sitting in the poring rain with Lucius during the Steelers-Browns game. Opening day started with the most excitement I had ever seen before. And then the game started. It was over after the Browns had four penalties on one play. The rain just made it perfect.
Rookie of the Year - Adrian Peterson. This guy is for real. Joe Thomas has been great, but man, Peterson would have looked amazing in a Browns uniform.
Game of the Year - Dallas 25 Buffalo 24 - Week Five - It could have been the Browns-Bengals game from week two but this Monday Night game was incredible. The Cowboys rallied to win it as time expired when they had to kick the game winning field goal, twice.
Now, on to our pick'em league.
MVP - The New England Patriots. I mean come on, they are 8-0 ATS!!
Mr. Consistency - Yours truly. I hate to brag, but my worst week has been 7-9 back in week two. Every other week I've been over .500, no one else can say that.
Best E-mails - Kevin Hunt. Bart was a close second, but Kevin has come through almost every week from the other side of the world.
THE Best E-Mail - Bart Borer, Week Nine. He might offend some, but he has without a doubt the funniest e-mail I have ever received.
Person to Look Out for in the 2nd Half - Matt Barnes. This guy was at the top after two weeks, and then hit a rough spot. However, I could see him picking up steam down the stretch.
Mr. Reliable - Mr. Normand. He always comes through with his picks and always has a great comment for every single game. No one else can say this.
Biggest Controversy - Michael Grothaus, Week Eight. He simply forgot.
Best Radio Show Partner - Devin Frank. O.C.R Tuesday's @ 9 on WHEI 88.9 FM.
Best Fantasy Player - Sara Normand. I said so way back in week one, and she has not let me down. Her team McNabb It is good. Really good. Almost like the Patriots good.
Well that wraps up the first annual Skywalker's. Onto the picks.
STANDINGS (after eight weeks)
1) Luke 67-49 (8-5)
2) Sara 63-53 (6-7)
3) Devin 62-54 (8-5)
4) Kevin 61-55 (9-4)
5) Mr. Normand 59-57 (8-5)
6) Bart 56-60 (8-5)
7) Barnes 54-62 (8-5)
7) Grothaus 54-62 (4-9)
Washington (-3.5) @ New York Jets
How good are the Patriots? Well, they smoke the Redskins 52-7 and then next week the Redskins are favored ON THE ROAD by over a field goal. Just another way Belichick is sticking it to Mangini. Pick: Washington
As I currently write this, Kevin has not gotten his picks in. I'm headed to his house this afternoon, so we'll get them then.
Bart gets things started on a great note by giving the Jets something else to spell, "J-E-T-S!Suck! Suck! Suck! Should be the new chant in New York."
Mr. Normand tried, but could not think of a single reason to pick the Jets.
WAS: Luke, Sara, Devin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
NYJ:
Green Bay @ Kansas City (-2.5)
I still do not trust these Packers. Especially coming off of a road Monday Night game. In Herm Edwards I Trust. Pick: Kansas City
Mr. Normand follows my line of thinking, "Green Bay hangover from Monday Night Football."
Bart puts things in perspective however, "I have to take a 6-1 team getting points to a 4-3 team." We'll see.
GB: Sara, Devin, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
KC: Luke, Mr. Normand
Arizona @ Tampa Bay (-3.5)
Going with the Bucs. Don't know why. I hate the NFC. Pick: Tampa Bay
Bart and I both agree when he says, "I dont really care about either of these teams, but I would like to live in either of these places." Absolutely.
Mr. Normand says, "Another great match-up of NOBODIES."
Does the NFC have to be represented in the Super Bowl?
ARI: Mr. Normand, Grothaus
TB: Luke, Sara, Devin, Bart, Barnes
Carolina @ Tennessee (-4)
Playing a hunch that the Titans will win by three. Call me crazy. Pick: Carolina
I think Devin is asking for a provisional pick when he says, "Vince Young rule (he must start)."
Mr. Normand says the Panthers are falling apart. I guess he is referring to the fact that Vinny Testaverde is STARTING. Wow.
CAR: Luke
TEN: Sara, Devin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
San Francisco @ Atlanta (-3)
The Falcons are favored by three? This is insane! The oddsmakers must know something that I don't. Seriously though, we have more players in this pick'em league than will actually attend this game. Pick: San Francisco
Mr. Normand does the correct thing by flipping a coin for this game with three total wins between them.
Bart has another great point, "I don’t think they (Atlanta) can score enough to cover, even when they are getting points." I love my friends.
SF: Luke, Sara, Devin, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
ATL: Mr. Normand
Jacksonville @ New Orleans (-3.5)
Keep riding the hot team until they let you down. Right now the Saints are on fire. Pick: New Orleans
Bart had plenty of options, but this came through as the quote of the week, "I had to throw some love to the Saints this week, it is the least I can do, because I will probably not make it to mass on All Saints Day, a holy day of obligation. I think I just got struck by lightning, which is weird because I am in an office, and it is nice outside. Yikes!"
Mr. Normand asks a really good question, "Drew lighting it up--who is the Jags QB anyway?"
I believe the answer is Quinn Gray. Yeah, I like my pick a lot more now.
JAX: Sara, Grothaus
NO: Luke, Devin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes
Denver @ Detroit (-3)
The Broncos are just 1-6 ATS this year. While the Lions are 5-2 ATS overall, 2-0 ATS while being favored, and 3-0 ATS @ home. Numbers like that make this easy. Pick: Detroit
Sara hands out some hardware, "Jon Kitna wins my award for best Halloween costume ... he and his wife went as a naked man and drive-thru attendant as a tribute to one of the Lions coaches who got arrested for going through a drive-thru naked. I would've never expected this from this man." Is it too late to change my pick?
Mr. Normand senses a high scoring affair, with Kitna throwing a couple TD's. My fantasy team, Brady's Bunch would like to see those TD's tossed to Kevin Jones and Calvin Johnson.
DEN: Sara, Devin, Barnes
DET: Luke, Mr. Normand, Bart, Grothaus
Cincinnati @ Buffalo (PK)
For the first time all year we have a straight up pick'em. The Bills are 4-0 ATS at home this year. However they are throwing J.P. Losman out there this week. I can't back Losman. Not a chance. Pick: Cincinnati
Devin adds a comment that I cannot post. It involves asking "Who Dey?" And then answering said question. Lucius knows the answer.
Sara gives the Bengals the '07 award for team chemistry. I love it.
Bart, who is 2-0 when he does this, has another provisional pick, "The team that is wearing the darker jerseys. Both teams suck, the team that attracts the most sunlight with its jerseys will stay the warmest during the game which will in turn lead to victory."
Mr. Normand is enjoying the empty bandwagon in Cincy. I would imagine it's been quiet there in Cincy the last couple of weeks.
CIN: Luke, Devin, Barnes
BUF: Sara, Mr. Normand, Grothaus
San Diego (-7.5) @ Minnesota
The following scenario is all set to begin.
I start believing in this Chargers team.
They start looking good and covering games.
Norv Turner senses this and then when I start backing them, does something that makes absolutely no sense. For example, pulling LT in the 2nd half.
The Chargers quit on Turner.
Get ready folks. Pick: San Diego
Bart thinks the real coaching is coming from somebody else, "The Chargers are back, I think LaDanian Tomlinson may be doing the actual coaching now. Ron Turner is just a figure head, kinda like the Queen of England, they make a lot of money but don’t do any work." Yep, he said Ron Turner. Yes, these are my friends.
Mr. Normand says that the Chargers are finally starting to find the endzone on both sides of the ball.
SD: Luke, Sara, Devin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
MIN:
Seattle @ Cleveland (-1)
Kind of a big game for this Browns team. If they have any hopes of making it to the playoffs they either need to win the AFC North, or probably have 10 wins at least. It needs to be seen if Derek Anderson can come through against a decent team. These next three games are going to be crucial. Home vs. Seattle, At Pittsburgh and At Baltimore. Gotta get this one. Pick: Cleveland
Sara comes through with yet another award, "It needs to be noted that the Browns get the award for playing New England the closest out of anyone through this entire season!!!! BROWNIES!" While this is true it may have something to do with Belichick and Crennel still getting along.
It should be pointed out that Sara is 7-0 picking Seattle games. Go Browns.
Bart sees bad things in this match-up for the Browns, "The Brownies are due for a let down, they haven’t won three in a row in 45652566325665365 years." It's true, I looked it up.
Mr. Normand is wishing for a time change in this game, and for good reason, "Wish it was at 1PM - will be at Quicken arena watching while waiting for Springsteen!!!" Doesn't get too much better than that.
SEA: Devin, Bart, Barnes
CLE: Luke, Sara, Mr. Normand, Grothaus
New England (-5.5) @ Indianapolis
They are calling it Super Bowl 41.5. It's the first time in NFL history that teams with at least a 7-0 record are playing each other. The winner will be in the driver seat for AFC home field advantage. The loser will still only be just one game back. I honestly think the Patriots are going to destroy this Colts team. Then, all the talk will shift to whether or not the Patriots will go 19-0. You will also then see a segment on ESPN matching up this Patriots team to all the great NFL teams of all-time. Kirk Herbstreit is already on record of taking the Patriots except if they would play the 2005 USC team. Pick: New England
Bart wants to pick New England but can't go against the Colts at home while getting points.
Mr. Normand is relieved to finally have a game that means something, other than the Browns of course.
Sara pours a glass of haterade for Bill Simmons, "I planned on picking Indi a couple weeks ago but I got embarrassed last week by picking Washington. I'm not making that mistake again. I blame Bill Simmons. After making all my picks I saw we made 9 of 12 the same ... Let's just say his wife is doing better than him."
NE: Luke, Sara, Devin, Grothaus
IND: Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes
Houston @ Oakland (-3)
Not picking Houston again until they get healthy. Andre Johnson is not coming back until week 11. Oh, did I mention I'm 8-0 picking Texans games? Pick: Oakland
Bart flipped a coin, which landed Heads. He picked Houston because they both started with an "h". What's not to love?
I seriously feel bad for Gus Johnson. He should be doing the Colts-Pats game. A game of that magnitude deserves Gus. Instead he is sittting at Oakland writing hate mail to Jim Nantz and Greg Gumbel.
HOU: Sara, Bart, Barnes
OAK: Luke, Devin, Mr. Normand, Grothaus
Dallas (-3) @ Philadelphia
Picking the Cowboys. Let the comments about Andy Reid's house begin. Pick: Dallas
Bart's got a good one about Reid's kids, "I think Andy Reid should start hanging out with his sons more, not so he can keep them out of trouble, but rather so he can let loose and have more fun. Just a thought, his sons seem like they know how to party."
It should be noted that authorities called Reid's house a "drug imporium." Now, I don't know what the levels of drug houses are, but I would think "imporium" would be high on that list.
Mr. Normand takes the high road (pun intended) by saying the Eagles need the win, but won't get it.
DAL: Luke, Sara, Devin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
PHI:
Baltimore @ Pittsburgh (-9)
The Ravens are 1-6 ATS. The only team that is worse are the Rams at 1-7. I'd love to take the points with this one, but I've been getting killed picking against the Steelers this year. Pick: Pittsburgh
Sara backs the Steelers and then hopes she is wrong for the Browns sake. Mr. Normand does the same.
Bart is thanking the Steelers for making the entire city of Cincy quiet for yet another week.
BAL:
PIT: Luke, Sara, Devin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
That wraps it up for the picks. Like I mentioned earlier, I will be getting Kevin's picks soon.
Now I give the microphone to Bart. He said he spent four hours coming up with the following, and let me be the first to tell you, it was time well spent.
BART'S THOUGHTS OF THE WEEK
"First of all, I am not a man to toot my own horn very often (though I do toot quite regularly), but I am gonna have to say that my Nacho Libre costume was the best costume in all of Oxford last weekend. Also since I know there are some OU students in our group (past, present, and future, with Luke being the past and the future part of that statement), I was told that my costume would have been the best one in Athens as well, so I must have done something right. I am guessing that is was a mixture of a couple things. First I kinda look like Jack Black anyway, so that was a big help. Second, I grew and pampered a 100% all-natural mustache, that way I wasn’t just playing the part, I was BEING the part. Third, I did not wear a shirt of any kind throughout the whole night, so for all of you who don’t know my central region very well, I got to show off my sweet chest and stomach hair, which was very interesting in the mall and at a house party and at the bars in uptown Oxford. Last but not least, I was half of a handle into a bottle of rum before I did anything, so that may have been the biggest help of all.
To Kevin, I agree that we should stop trying to pick the Boring Game of the Week. Collectively we are a very big 0 for 2 in our picks, because each of our picks may have actually been the most exciting game of its respective week. We suck, there is nothing more to it than that.
As for the Grothaus situation, we should do one of two things. We should either make the 1-12 record stand because it seems as if Luke really tried to get a hold of him and lets face it, we do not need to be baby-sitted (sat?) anymore, we are all adults and we have one simple task for this each week and it is really not that hard. To be honest, it can be as simple as sending Luke a text that says “I pick all underdogs this week," that takes three seconds, maybe four if you have fat fingers like me and will usually give you about a .500 winning percentage. I only know this because I have done this, or a slight variation of this, three different times and I think my winning percentage for those weeks is actually higher than the weeks I try to think about each game individually. Anyway, my second option is that we give him those extra three wins and then kill him, so that way he doesn’t beat me by one win for second-to-last place at the end of the year.
Awards:
Diversity Award: Matt Barnes
Way-To-Complicated Ballbuster Pick of the Week Award: Kevin Hunt
Horrible Boring Game of the Week Picker Award: Kevin Hunt, Bart Borer
Consistently Knowledgeable Comments Award: Jeff Normand, Devin Frank
The I Have Way Too Much Free Time, So I Write A Really Awesome, Sarcastic, And Funny Blog Award: Luke Florence
No Comments Ever Award: Mike Grothaus
The I Stay Up Until All Hours Of The Day and Night To Watch Sports In The US Via Webcam Award: Sara Normand, Kevin Hunt
For those of you that don’t know this, Kevin Hunt is very short and isn’t going to get taller anytime soon. That is why I decided to give him three awards and everyone else just one. Since I can’t boost his eye level, I thought I would give his ego a boost.
Good luck to everyone except Barnes, not for any other reason than I don’t want to get last in this God forsaken contest of trying to pick which millionaire a-hole athletes are actually going to care about their job for any given week. I have come to the conclusion that it is like trying to predict the exact time that I am gonna take my afternoon dump, its hard to do because most of the time I don’t even know what I am gonna eat for lunch, which makes a big difference … I suck and I know it, I just needed a place to vent. Peace. Love. Hot Dogs."
That is exactly what I had in mind when I came up with that segment.
Best of luck to everyone, and until next time, "read it, roll it, hole it."
The Grothaus Scandal of 2007 has been ruled upon. After getting feedback from the entire league, I have decided to give Grothaus three more wins which puts him in a tie for 7th place. Now if Grothaus goes on to win this thing by one or two I might have a mutiny on my hands. Staying with players in this pick'em I apologize to Mr. Normand. You are absolutely right, no more Jeff. I don't know what I was thinking. And lastly, with regards to Barnes, expect an e-mail and/or phone call sometime later today.
Okay, now that I got the business aspect of this post taken care of, I can move onto the pleasure side.
I thought it would be fitting to give half-way awards to not only the NFL players, but to players of this pick'em as well. Sit back and enjoy. The first annual Skywalker's are ready to begin.
MVP - Tom Brady. No surprise here. He is the best quarterback in the league and is on pace to throw 60 TD's and 4 INT's. He could take four weeks off and still be a sure bet for this award.
Offensive Player of the Year - See above.
Defensive Player of the Year - Osi Umenyiora. Basing this solely on one game earlier this year against the Eagles where he sacked McNabb six times.
Coach of the Year - Eric Mangini. Even though his Jets are at 1-7 he is the sole reason the Patriots are killing everyone.
Surprise Player of the Year - Derek Anderson. If the Pro Bowl started today, he would be the third QB in the AFC behind Manning and Brady. He has thrown the 2nd most TD's in the league and has the Browns sitting at 4-3.
Best Moment of the Year - Walking back from the Ravens-Browns game back in week four. It took seven tries, but I finally got to experience a Browns win. High fives and smiles from the masses was something I had never seen in Cleveland Browns Stadium.
Worst Moment of the Year - Sitting in the poring rain with Lucius during the Steelers-Browns game. Opening day started with the most excitement I had ever seen before. And then the game started. It was over after the Browns had four penalties on one play. The rain just made it perfect.
Rookie of the Year - Adrian Peterson. This guy is for real. Joe Thomas has been great, but man, Peterson would have looked amazing in a Browns uniform.
Game of the Year - Dallas 25 Buffalo 24 - Week Five - It could have been the Browns-Bengals game from week two but this Monday Night game was incredible. The Cowboys rallied to win it as time expired when they had to kick the game winning field goal, twice.
Now, on to our pick'em league.
MVP - The New England Patriots. I mean come on, they are 8-0 ATS!!
Mr. Consistency - Yours truly. I hate to brag, but my worst week has been 7-9 back in week two. Every other week I've been over .500, no one else can say that.
Best E-mails - Kevin Hunt. Bart was a close second, but Kevin has come through almost every week from the other side of the world.
THE Best E-Mail - Bart Borer, Week Nine. He might offend some, but he has without a doubt the funniest e-mail I have ever received.
Person to Look Out for in the 2nd Half - Matt Barnes. This guy was at the top after two weeks, and then hit a rough spot. However, I could see him picking up steam down the stretch.
Mr. Reliable - Mr. Normand. He always comes through with his picks and always has a great comment for every single game. No one else can say this.
Biggest Controversy - Michael Grothaus, Week Eight. He simply forgot.
Best Radio Show Partner - Devin Frank. O.C.R Tuesday's @ 9 on WHEI 88.9 FM.
Best Fantasy Player - Sara Normand. I said so way back in week one, and she has not let me down. Her team McNabb It is good. Really good. Almost like the Patriots good.
Well that wraps up the first annual Skywalker's. Onto the picks.
STANDINGS (after eight weeks)
1) Luke 67-49 (8-5)
2) Sara 63-53 (6-7)
3) Devin 62-54 (8-5)
4) Kevin 61-55 (9-4)
5) Mr. Normand 59-57 (8-5)
6) Bart 56-60 (8-5)
7) Barnes 54-62 (8-5)
7) Grothaus 54-62 (4-9)
Washington (-3.5) @ New York Jets
How good are the Patriots? Well, they smoke the Redskins 52-7 and then next week the Redskins are favored ON THE ROAD by over a field goal. Just another way Belichick is sticking it to Mangini. Pick: Washington
As I currently write this, Kevin has not gotten his picks in. I'm headed to his house this afternoon, so we'll get them then.
Bart gets things started on a great note by giving the Jets something else to spell, "J-E-T-S!Suck! Suck! Suck! Should be the new chant in New York."
Mr. Normand tried, but could not think of a single reason to pick the Jets.
WAS: Luke, Sara, Devin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
NYJ:
Green Bay @ Kansas City (-2.5)
I still do not trust these Packers. Especially coming off of a road Monday Night game. In Herm Edwards I Trust. Pick: Kansas City
Mr. Normand follows my line of thinking, "Green Bay hangover from Monday Night Football."
Bart puts things in perspective however, "I have to take a 6-1 team getting points to a 4-3 team." We'll see.
GB: Sara, Devin, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
KC: Luke, Mr. Normand
Arizona @ Tampa Bay (-3.5)
Going with the Bucs. Don't know why. I hate the NFC. Pick: Tampa Bay
Bart and I both agree when he says, "I dont really care about either of these teams, but I would like to live in either of these places." Absolutely.
Mr. Normand says, "Another great match-up of NOBODIES."
Does the NFC have to be represented in the Super Bowl?
ARI: Mr. Normand, Grothaus
TB: Luke, Sara, Devin, Bart, Barnes
Carolina @ Tennessee (-4)
Playing a hunch that the Titans will win by three. Call me crazy. Pick: Carolina
I think Devin is asking for a provisional pick when he says, "Vince Young rule (he must start)."
Mr. Normand says the Panthers are falling apart. I guess he is referring to the fact that Vinny Testaverde is STARTING. Wow.
CAR: Luke
TEN: Sara, Devin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
San Francisco @ Atlanta (-3)
The Falcons are favored by three? This is insane! The oddsmakers must know something that I don't. Seriously though, we have more players in this pick'em league than will actually attend this game. Pick: San Francisco
Mr. Normand does the correct thing by flipping a coin for this game with three total wins between them.
Bart has another great point, "I don’t think they (Atlanta) can score enough to cover, even when they are getting points." I love my friends.
SF: Luke, Sara, Devin, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
ATL: Mr. Normand
Jacksonville @ New Orleans (-3.5)
Keep riding the hot team until they let you down. Right now the Saints are on fire. Pick: New Orleans
Bart had plenty of options, but this came through as the quote of the week, "I had to throw some love to the Saints this week, it is the least I can do, because I will probably not make it to mass on All Saints Day, a holy day of obligation. I think I just got struck by lightning, which is weird because I am in an office, and it is nice outside. Yikes!"
Mr. Normand asks a really good question, "Drew lighting it up--who is the Jags QB anyway?"
I believe the answer is Quinn Gray. Yeah, I like my pick a lot more now.
JAX: Sara, Grothaus
NO: Luke, Devin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes
Denver @ Detroit (-3)
The Broncos are just 1-6 ATS this year. While the Lions are 5-2 ATS overall, 2-0 ATS while being favored, and 3-0 ATS @ home. Numbers like that make this easy. Pick: Detroit
Sara hands out some hardware, "Jon Kitna wins my award for best Halloween costume ... he and his wife went as a naked man and drive-thru attendant as a tribute to one of the Lions coaches who got arrested for going through a drive-thru naked. I would've never expected this from this man." Is it too late to change my pick?
Mr. Normand senses a high scoring affair, with Kitna throwing a couple TD's. My fantasy team, Brady's Bunch would like to see those TD's tossed to Kevin Jones and Calvin Johnson.
DEN: Sara, Devin, Barnes
DET: Luke, Mr. Normand, Bart, Grothaus
Cincinnati @ Buffalo (PK)
For the first time all year we have a straight up pick'em. The Bills are 4-0 ATS at home this year. However they are throwing J.P. Losman out there this week. I can't back Losman. Not a chance. Pick: Cincinnati
Devin adds a comment that I cannot post. It involves asking "Who Dey?" And then answering said question. Lucius knows the answer.
Sara gives the Bengals the '07 award for team chemistry. I love it.
Bart, who is 2-0 when he does this, has another provisional pick, "The team that is wearing the darker jerseys. Both teams suck, the team that attracts the most sunlight with its jerseys will stay the warmest during the game which will in turn lead to victory."
Mr. Normand is enjoying the empty bandwagon in Cincy. I would imagine it's been quiet there in Cincy the last couple of weeks.
CIN: Luke, Devin, Barnes
BUF: Sara, Mr. Normand, Grothaus
San Diego (-7.5) @ Minnesota
The following scenario is all set to begin.
I start believing in this Chargers team.
They start looking good and covering games.
Norv Turner senses this and then when I start backing them, does something that makes absolutely no sense. For example, pulling LT in the 2nd half.
The Chargers quit on Turner.
Get ready folks. Pick: San Diego
Bart thinks the real coaching is coming from somebody else, "The Chargers are back, I think LaDanian Tomlinson may be doing the actual coaching now. Ron Turner is just a figure head, kinda like the Queen of England, they make a lot of money but don’t do any work." Yep, he said Ron Turner. Yes, these are my friends.
Mr. Normand says that the Chargers are finally starting to find the endzone on both sides of the ball.
SD: Luke, Sara, Devin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
MIN:
Seattle @ Cleveland (-1)
Kind of a big game for this Browns team. If they have any hopes of making it to the playoffs they either need to win the AFC North, or probably have 10 wins at least. It needs to be seen if Derek Anderson can come through against a decent team. These next three games are going to be crucial. Home vs. Seattle, At Pittsburgh and At Baltimore. Gotta get this one. Pick: Cleveland
Sara comes through with yet another award, "It needs to be noted that the Browns get the award for playing New England the closest out of anyone through this entire season!!!! BROWNIES!" While this is true it may have something to do with Belichick and Crennel still getting along.
It should be pointed out that Sara is 7-0 picking Seattle games. Go Browns.
Bart sees bad things in this match-up for the Browns, "The Brownies are due for a let down, they haven’t won three in a row in 45652566325665365 years." It's true, I looked it up.
Mr. Normand is wishing for a time change in this game, and for good reason, "Wish it was at 1PM - will be at Quicken arena watching while waiting for Springsteen!!!" Doesn't get too much better than that.
SEA: Devin, Bart, Barnes
CLE: Luke, Sara, Mr. Normand, Grothaus
New England (-5.5) @ Indianapolis
They are calling it Super Bowl 41.5. It's the first time in NFL history that teams with at least a 7-0 record are playing each other. The winner will be in the driver seat for AFC home field advantage. The loser will still only be just one game back. I honestly think the Patriots are going to destroy this Colts team. Then, all the talk will shift to whether or not the Patriots will go 19-0. You will also then see a segment on ESPN matching up this Patriots team to all the great NFL teams of all-time. Kirk Herbstreit is already on record of taking the Patriots except if they would play the 2005 USC team. Pick: New England
Bart wants to pick New England but can't go against the Colts at home while getting points.
Mr. Normand is relieved to finally have a game that means something, other than the Browns of course.
Sara pours a glass of haterade for Bill Simmons, "I planned on picking Indi a couple weeks ago but I got embarrassed last week by picking Washington. I'm not making that mistake again. I blame Bill Simmons. After making all my picks I saw we made 9 of 12 the same ... Let's just say his wife is doing better than him."
NE: Luke, Sara, Devin, Grothaus
IND: Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes
Houston @ Oakland (-3)
Not picking Houston again until they get healthy. Andre Johnson is not coming back until week 11. Oh, did I mention I'm 8-0 picking Texans games? Pick: Oakland
Bart flipped a coin, which landed Heads. He picked Houston because they both started with an "h". What's not to love?
I seriously feel bad for Gus Johnson. He should be doing the Colts-Pats game. A game of that magnitude deserves Gus. Instead he is sittting at Oakland writing hate mail to Jim Nantz and Greg Gumbel.
HOU: Sara, Bart, Barnes
OAK: Luke, Devin, Mr. Normand, Grothaus
Dallas (-3) @ Philadelphia
Picking the Cowboys. Let the comments about Andy Reid's house begin. Pick: Dallas
Bart's got a good one about Reid's kids, "I think Andy Reid should start hanging out with his sons more, not so he can keep them out of trouble, but rather so he can let loose and have more fun. Just a thought, his sons seem like they know how to party."
It should be noted that authorities called Reid's house a "drug imporium." Now, I don't know what the levels of drug houses are, but I would think "imporium" would be high on that list.
Mr. Normand takes the high road (pun intended) by saying the Eagles need the win, but won't get it.
DAL: Luke, Sara, Devin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
PHI:
Baltimore @ Pittsburgh (-9)
The Ravens are 1-6 ATS. The only team that is worse are the Rams at 1-7. I'd love to take the points with this one, but I've been getting killed picking against the Steelers this year. Pick: Pittsburgh
Sara backs the Steelers and then hopes she is wrong for the Browns sake. Mr. Normand does the same.
Bart is thanking the Steelers for making the entire city of Cincy quiet for yet another week.
BAL:
PIT: Luke, Sara, Devin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
That wraps it up for the picks. Like I mentioned earlier, I will be getting Kevin's picks soon.
Now I give the microphone to Bart. He said he spent four hours coming up with the following, and let me be the first to tell you, it was time well spent.
BART'S THOUGHTS OF THE WEEK
"First of all, I am not a man to toot my own horn very often (though I do toot quite regularly), but I am gonna have to say that my Nacho Libre costume was the best costume in all of Oxford last weekend. Also since I know there are some OU students in our group (past, present, and future, with Luke being the past and the future part of that statement), I was told that my costume would have been the best one in Athens as well, so I must have done something right. I am guessing that is was a mixture of a couple things. First I kinda look like Jack Black anyway, so that was a big help. Second, I grew and pampered a 100% all-natural mustache, that way I wasn’t just playing the part, I was BEING the part. Third, I did not wear a shirt of any kind throughout the whole night, so for all of you who don’t know my central region very well, I got to show off my sweet chest and stomach hair, which was very interesting in the mall and at a house party and at the bars in uptown Oxford. Last but not least, I was half of a handle into a bottle of rum before I did anything, so that may have been the biggest help of all.
To Kevin, I agree that we should stop trying to pick the Boring Game of the Week. Collectively we are a very big 0 for 2 in our picks, because each of our picks may have actually been the most exciting game of its respective week. We suck, there is nothing more to it than that.
As for the Grothaus situation, we should do one of two things. We should either make the 1-12 record stand because it seems as if Luke really tried to get a hold of him and lets face it, we do not need to be baby-sitted (sat?) anymore, we are all adults and we have one simple task for this each week and it is really not that hard. To be honest, it can be as simple as sending Luke a text that says “I pick all underdogs this week," that takes three seconds, maybe four if you have fat fingers like me and will usually give you about a .500 winning percentage. I only know this because I have done this, or a slight variation of this, three different times and I think my winning percentage for those weeks is actually higher than the weeks I try to think about each game individually. Anyway, my second option is that we give him those extra three wins and then kill him, so that way he doesn’t beat me by one win for second-to-last place at the end of the year.
Awards:
Diversity Award: Matt Barnes
Way-To-Complicated Ballbuster Pick of the Week Award: Kevin Hunt
Horrible Boring Game of the Week Picker Award: Kevin Hunt, Bart Borer
Consistently Knowledgeable Comments Award: Jeff Normand, Devin Frank
The I Have Way Too Much Free Time, So I Write A Really Awesome, Sarcastic, And Funny Blog Award: Luke Florence
No Comments Ever Award: Mike Grothaus
The I Stay Up Until All Hours Of The Day and Night To Watch Sports In The US Via Webcam Award: Sara Normand, Kevin Hunt
For those of you that don’t know this, Kevin Hunt is very short and isn’t going to get taller anytime soon. That is why I decided to give him three awards and everyone else just one. Since I can’t boost his eye level, I thought I would give his ego a boost.
Good luck to everyone except Barnes, not for any other reason than I don’t want to get last in this God forsaken contest of trying to pick which millionaire a-hole athletes are actually going to care about their job for any given week. I have come to the conclusion that it is like trying to predict the exact time that I am gonna take my afternoon dump, its hard to do because most of the time I don’t even know what I am gonna eat for lunch, which makes a big difference … I suck and I know it, I just needed a place to vent. Peace. Love. Hot Dogs."
That is exactly what I had in mind when I came up with that segment.
Best of luck to everyone, and until next time, "read it, roll it, hole it."
Sunday, October 28, 2007
2007 NFL Picks Week Eight
Due to most of my writing time this week being spent on a soon-to-be released massive column on the Cleveland Indians, it means this column will be on the short side. Not to worry, we still have a Maxine Hunt pick to look forward to as well as another Ballbuster Pick of the Week. So it's not a total loss.
Congrats to me again for having the best record last week, going 11-3. The 11-3 record just so happens to be the best record anyone has had throughout seven weeks. There's still plenty of time for someone to one-up that mark.
One last side note before getting into the picks. Two of our players, Kevin and Sara, are coming home from Australia this upcoming week. On behalf of our league I wish them a safe flight home and I'm looking forward to the Seahawks game here in a week. Giddy up.
STANDINGS (after seven weeks)
1) Luke 59-44 (11-3)
2) Sara 57-46 (9-5)
3) Devin 54-49 (9-5)
4) Kevin 52-51 (9-5)
5) Mr. Normand 51-52 (8-6)
6) Grothaus 50-53 (5-9) * went back through the weeks, and saw that I missed one
7) Bart 48-55 (6-8)
8) Barnes 46-57 (6-8)
Cleveland (-3) @ St. Louis
This just screams "obvious game," but I'm not listening. I went back through the first seven weeks and compiled everyone's records against individual teams. For example, Devin has the best record with the Browns at 4-2, while Devin, Sara, and Barnes lead the way for the Rams at 4-3. Such is my life. Pick: Cleveland
Sara brings up a great point about the recent changes to the NFL Draft, "I don't have anything to say this week other than I'm glad the NFL is shortening time for draft picks to 10 minutes. Too bad this doesn't affect the Browns next year." True story.
Kevin has a full slate of comments to enjoy and starts it out with, "Steven Jackson just made this a closer game than it needs to be, but I see the Browns defense stepping up in this game. The bye week should have helped Antwan Peek and Willie McGinest heal a little bit, which should help the pass rush on Bulger. Or at least we can only hope." Welcome to the life of a Browns fan.
Mr. Normand keeps it simple, "Go Browns. Enough said." Yes sir.
CLE: Luke, Sara, Devin, Kevin, Mr. Normand, Barnes
STL: Bart
Detroit @ Chicago (-5)
The Lions have failed to cover on the road this year while the Bears haven't covered at home yet as well. Something has to give. I'm going with the Bears because I'm shivering at the mere thought of the Lions sitting at 5-2. Pick: Chicago
Mr. Normand picks Detroit and then says, "The Lions need to wake up to win 10 games." Well, they win this one and they will be well on their way.
Kevin doesn't have a comment but is 5-1 so far picking the Lions games. Do with this as you will.
DET: Kevin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes
CHI: Luke, Sara, Devin
Indianapolis (-7) @ Carolina
This is the definition of a trap game, especially with Marvin Harrison not playing. However, Vinny Testaverde IS playing, and that should bold well for Bob Sanders. Pick: Indianapolis
Mr. Normand follows my line of thinking as he hopes the Colts aren't looking ahead.
Kevin asks a question that he and I both know the answer to, "I swore I would take the Panthers if Vinny and Byron Leftwich started in the same week. Now Vinny might not even start and Leftwich is out 3-4 weeks with an ankle injury. There's no way I can seriously hold the power to injure people from thousands of miles away just by talking about them, can I??"
IND: Luke, Sara, Devin, Kevin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes
CAR:
New York Giants (-9.5) @ Miami @ London
The Dolphins are having a bad couple of weeks. Trent Green goes down with a season ending concussion. Ronnie Brown is done for the year. Chris Chambers is traded to the Chargers. Now, they have a home game @ London. Go figure. Pick: New York Giants
Mr. Normand adds a little English flavor, "Taking the bloddy GMEN, of course." I love it.
Kevin comes through with yet another quote of the week, "Cleo Lemon?? Jessie Chatman?? The Dolphins are looking worse every week. They even lost linebacker Zach Thomas because he's suffering from whiplash. The ironic thing is, the injury occurred after last weekend's loss in Miami to the Patriots. Thomas was rear-ended in his car by, according to police reports, a man wearing a New England jersey. They can't catch a break and still won't when they head to England. If the Dolphins can't beat NEW England, how are they supposed to beat Old ('Olde'??) England?? The word 'bloody' will have two meanings to English fans attending in London this weekend: 'The bloody Giants beat the blood out of the Dolphins. How bloody much did we pay for these tickets?? Bloody hell.'" Yes, these are my friends.
NYG: Luke, Sara, Devin, Kevin, Mr. Normand, Barnes
MIA: Bart
Oakland @ Tennessee (-7)
I've actually done quite well picking Titans games this year, posting a league best 4-2 record. However, this does nothing for me as I'm really not sure on this one. I'm banking on the Raiders keeping it close. God help me. Pick: Oakland
Kevin's Ballbuster Pick of the Week (2-4): Tennessee
Instead of over complicating things this week, Kevin decides to keep it simple and take the home team in the fifth game listed.
"I think the record for this pick is just bad. I don't even want to know it. But I am taking a different approach. Perhaps I threw too much at my Ballbuster picks right at the beginning of the year, making it more difficult to understand. That's why I'm dumbing down the playbook a little bit, so the Ballbuster can get back on track." We'll see.
OAK: Luke, Sara, Bart
TEN: Devin, Kevin, Mr. Normand, Barnes
Philadelphia (-1) @ Minnesota
I started the season 0-4 on Eagles games, but somehow managed to win the last two. Here's to hoping I can make it three. Pick: Philadelphia
Mr. Normand does the correct thing as he says, "I'm tired of waiting for McNabb to have another good game."
Philly has been one of those teams that just can not put two good games together. They also have been favored every week, going 2-4 ATS. Ouch.
Kevin wants to give up on the Eagles, but just can't quite yet, "I can't get off the Eagles' train. Making this spread one point just begs me to keep picking them. So I will."
PHI: Luke, Devin, Kevin
MIN: Sara, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes
Pittsburgh (-3.5) @ Cincinnati
The Steelers are 1-2 ATS on the road while the Bengals are 2-1 at home. Here's to hoping that trend continues. Pick: Cincinnati
Mr. Normand feels that even though the Bengals sometimes play up to their competition, it won't be this time.
Kevin provides some insider information I'm betting he gained during his internship, "The Steelers own the Bengals at Paul Brown Stadium. This is a true instance of me not betting on my hopes." All of a sudden I don't like my pick.
PIT: Devin, Kevin, Mr. Normand
CIN: Luke, Sara, Bart, Barnes
Buffalo @ New York Jets (-3)
I'm 99% confident of my pick in this AFC East match-up. The Bills are simply not the same team on the road as they are at home. They are a perfect 4-0 at home ATS and 0-2 on the road. Pick: New York Jets
Maxine Hunt Pick of the Week (2-0): New York Jets
"Me: Buffalo at New York Jets, Jets are 3-point favorites
Mom: ? thinking**After a period of time...**
Mom: Jets
Me: Well, you spent some time on it, any particular reason why you chose them??
Mom: Cuz when i think Buffalo.....I think Buffalo Buffons
Mom: or maybe Baffoons
Mom: sounds like balloon
Mom: genius, right
Once again, she's 2-0, how can I NOT go with her picks."
Wow.
BUF: Sara, Devin, Bart, Barnes
NYJ: Luke, Kevin, Mr. Normand
Houston @ San Diego (-9)
I don't know how this happened, but I'm 7-0 on Houston Texans games. Go figure. Pick: San Diego
Mr. Normand throws a joke at Texans backup QB Sage Rosenfels, "I am not really a SAGE but going with the Chargers!"
Kevin does a good job of putting things in perspective, "Talk about not being a game about football at all. I sure hope the wildfires continue to die down/be put out. Something tells me the Chargers players will actually WANT to just play football this weekend, to not worry about their homes, etc. for a 3-4 hour period, though the opposite could happen just as easily."
HOU: Bart
SD: Luke, Sara, Devin, Kevin, Mr. Normand, Barnes
Jacksonville (-2.5) @ Tampa Bay
This spread does not do justice to the Jags QB Quinn Gray. I expect the Bucs to roll. Pick: Tampa Bay
Mr. Normand again follows my line of thinking as he expects the Bucs to beat up the Jags.
Kevin comes up with something that needs no introduction, "Have you seen this Gray guy pass the ball?? This game might be a Classic Browns score of 9-3. What's worse is I'm picking the former Brown, Jeff Garcia, to win the game. Is the world really ending?? Are the Browns 3-3?? Do I have any pants on??" For the second time this week, yes, these are my friends.
JAX: Sara, Devin
TB: Luke, Kevin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes
New Orleans (-3) @ San Francisco
The Saints have covered just one game this season, but it happened on the road. Probably had something to do with last years team not having a home. Pick: New Orleans
Mr. Normand cries for the Saints to finally win one for him this year. Well in all actuality, Mr. Normand shares the best record for the Saints with a 3-3 mark. Go figure.
These comments Kevin comes up with just keep getting better, "Alex Smith is back, but is not the reason why I'm taking the 49ers. Earlier this week I learned that the Australian National Basketball League team that plays in Adelaide is the 36ers. Have I seen them play?? No. But as you can probably tell from the Ballbuster Pick and Maxine Hunt pick, I don't put a whole lot of 'knowledge' into my choices." Yet he is in fourth place.
NO: Luke, Sara, Devin, Mr. Normand, Barnes
SF: Kevin, Bart
Washington @ New England (-16)
The Patriots are 7-0 on the season and 7-0 ATS. No one seems to think they can go 16-0 on both, but if there was one coach who wanted to stick it to everyone AND had the players to do it, it's Bill Belichick. To my surprise, I'm the only one to pick New England each week. Everyone else has picked against them at least twice. Thank you very much. Pick: New England
Mr. Normand says that he has been burned so far taking the points against the Patriots. He is 100% correct. Mr. Normand is 2-5 picking New England games. That hurts.
Kevin reminds us of a New England game a couple weeks ago, "Remember what happened when the Pats played the Cowboys, who supposedly had a great defense and would give New England fits?? A couple of good cornerbacks will not stop this team. My prediction for the score: NE 45, WASH 21."
WAS: Sara
NE: Luke, Devin, Kevin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes
Green Bay @ Denver (-3)
I don't know why, but I'm taking the Broncos. I guess I just don't think the Packers are well deserving of their 5-1 record. We'll see. Pick: Denver
Mr. Normand speaks for every Browns fan when he thanks the Broncos for beating the Steelers last week.
Kevin, which is the only person to have a winning record on Green Bay's games (5-1) says, "The Pack is getting points, I love it. The only thing that could pull down Green Bay this week is Brett Favre throwing the ball into bad situations while trying to prove to everyone that he still has a ton of arm strength. Well, that and the fact that DeShawn Wynn needs to show up in the Packers' running game. I just hope Favre throws nine interceptions and still wins, it would be classic."
GB: Kevin, Bart
DEN: Luke, Sara, Devin, Mr. Normand, Barnes
That's it for this week. Grothaus failed to get his picks in which causes some concern. Apparently no one has seen or heard from Grothaus since the Indians collapse. Go figure.
Bart does not have any thoughts for the week although I do know that he dressed up as Nacho Libre for Halloween. Fitting indeed.
Kevin however does have a message for Bart, "We are probably the worst two people at picking the 'Boring Game of the Week.' Mine ended up being a high scoring affair and his (Bengals-Jets) actually came down to the fourth quarter as well. We should just stop, it would do us a world of good." Gotta love it.
Allright, best of luck to everyone and GO BROWNS!!
Until next time, "read it, roll it, hole it."
Congrats to me again for having the best record last week, going 11-3. The 11-3 record just so happens to be the best record anyone has had throughout seven weeks. There's still plenty of time for someone to one-up that mark.
One last side note before getting into the picks. Two of our players, Kevin and Sara, are coming home from Australia this upcoming week. On behalf of our league I wish them a safe flight home and I'm looking forward to the Seahawks game here in a week. Giddy up.
STANDINGS (after seven weeks)
1) Luke 59-44 (11-3)
2) Sara 57-46 (9-5)
3) Devin 54-49 (9-5)
4) Kevin 52-51 (9-5)
5) Mr. Normand 51-52 (8-6)
6) Grothaus 50-53 (5-9) * went back through the weeks, and saw that I missed one
7) Bart 48-55 (6-8)
8) Barnes 46-57 (6-8)
Cleveland (-3) @ St. Louis
This just screams "obvious game," but I'm not listening. I went back through the first seven weeks and compiled everyone's records against individual teams. For example, Devin has the best record with the Browns at 4-2, while Devin, Sara, and Barnes lead the way for the Rams at 4-3. Such is my life. Pick: Cleveland
Sara brings up a great point about the recent changes to the NFL Draft, "I don't have anything to say this week other than I'm glad the NFL is shortening time for draft picks to 10 minutes. Too bad this doesn't affect the Browns next year." True story.
Kevin has a full slate of comments to enjoy and starts it out with, "Steven Jackson just made this a closer game than it needs to be, but I see the Browns defense stepping up in this game. The bye week should have helped Antwan Peek and Willie McGinest heal a little bit, which should help the pass rush on Bulger. Or at least we can only hope." Welcome to the life of a Browns fan.
Mr. Normand keeps it simple, "Go Browns. Enough said." Yes sir.
CLE: Luke, Sara, Devin, Kevin, Mr. Normand, Barnes
STL: Bart
Detroit @ Chicago (-5)
The Lions have failed to cover on the road this year while the Bears haven't covered at home yet as well. Something has to give. I'm going with the Bears because I'm shivering at the mere thought of the Lions sitting at 5-2. Pick: Chicago
Mr. Normand picks Detroit and then says, "The Lions need to wake up to win 10 games." Well, they win this one and they will be well on their way.
Kevin doesn't have a comment but is 5-1 so far picking the Lions games. Do with this as you will.
DET: Kevin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes
CHI: Luke, Sara, Devin
Indianapolis (-7) @ Carolina
This is the definition of a trap game, especially with Marvin Harrison not playing. However, Vinny Testaverde IS playing, and that should bold well for Bob Sanders. Pick: Indianapolis
Mr. Normand follows my line of thinking as he hopes the Colts aren't looking ahead.
Kevin asks a question that he and I both know the answer to, "I swore I would take the Panthers if Vinny and Byron Leftwich started in the same week. Now Vinny might not even start and Leftwich is out 3-4 weeks with an ankle injury. There's no way I can seriously hold the power to injure people from thousands of miles away just by talking about them, can I??"
IND: Luke, Sara, Devin, Kevin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes
CAR:
New York Giants (-9.5) @ Miami @ London
The Dolphins are having a bad couple of weeks. Trent Green goes down with a season ending concussion. Ronnie Brown is done for the year. Chris Chambers is traded to the Chargers. Now, they have a home game @ London. Go figure. Pick: New York Giants
Mr. Normand adds a little English flavor, "Taking the bloddy GMEN, of course." I love it.
Kevin comes through with yet another quote of the week, "Cleo Lemon?? Jessie Chatman?? The Dolphins are looking worse every week. They even lost linebacker Zach Thomas because he's suffering from whiplash. The ironic thing is, the injury occurred after last weekend's loss in Miami to the Patriots. Thomas was rear-ended in his car by, according to police reports, a man wearing a New England jersey. They can't catch a break and still won't when they head to England. If the Dolphins can't beat NEW England, how are they supposed to beat Old ('Olde'??) England?? The word 'bloody' will have two meanings to English fans attending in London this weekend: 'The bloody Giants beat the blood out of the Dolphins. How bloody much did we pay for these tickets?? Bloody hell.'" Yes, these are my friends.
NYG: Luke, Sara, Devin, Kevin, Mr. Normand, Barnes
MIA: Bart
Oakland @ Tennessee (-7)
I've actually done quite well picking Titans games this year, posting a league best 4-2 record. However, this does nothing for me as I'm really not sure on this one. I'm banking on the Raiders keeping it close. God help me. Pick: Oakland
Kevin's Ballbuster Pick of the Week (2-4): Tennessee
Instead of over complicating things this week, Kevin decides to keep it simple and take the home team in the fifth game listed.
"I think the record for this pick is just bad. I don't even want to know it. But I am taking a different approach. Perhaps I threw too much at my Ballbuster picks right at the beginning of the year, making it more difficult to understand. That's why I'm dumbing down the playbook a little bit, so the Ballbuster can get back on track." We'll see.
OAK: Luke, Sara, Bart
TEN: Devin, Kevin, Mr. Normand, Barnes
Philadelphia (-1) @ Minnesota
I started the season 0-4 on Eagles games, but somehow managed to win the last two. Here's to hoping I can make it three. Pick: Philadelphia
Mr. Normand does the correct thing as he says, "I'm tired of waiting for McNabb to have another good game."
Philly has been one of those teams that just can not put two good games together. They also have been favored every week, going 2-4 ATS. Ouch.
Kevin wants to give up on the Eagles, but just can't quite yet, "I can't get off the Eagles' train. Making this spread one point just begs me to keep picking them. So I will."
PHI: Luke, Devin, Kevin
MIN: Sara, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes
Pittsburgh (-3.5) @ Cincinnati
The Steelers are 1-2 ATS on the road while the Bengals are 2-1 at home. Here's to hoping that trend continues. Pick: Cincinnati
Mr. Normand feels that even though the Bengals sometimes play up to their competition, it won't be this time.
Kevin provides some insider information I'm betting he gained during his internship, "The Steelers own the Bengals at Paul Brown Stadium. This is a true instance of me not betting on my hopes." All of a sudden I don't like my pick.
PIT: Devin, Kevin, Mr. Normand
CIN: Luke, Sara, Bart, Barnes
Buffalo @ New York Jets (-3)
I'm 99% confident of my pick in this AFC East match-up. The Bills are simply not the same team on the road as they are at home. They are a perfect 4-0 at home ATS and 0-2 on the road. Pick: New York Jets
Maxine Hunt Pick of the Week (2-0): New York Jets
"Me: Buffalo at New York Jets, Jets are 3-point favorites
Mom: ? thinking**After a period of time...**
Mom: Jets
Me: Well, you spent some time on it, any particular reason why you chose them??
Mom: Cuz when i think Buffalo.....I think Buffalo Buffons
Mom: or maybe Baffoons
Mom: sounds like balloon
Mom: genius, right
Once again, she's 2-0, how can I NOT go with her picks."
Wow.
BUF: Sara, Devin, Bart, Barnes
NYJ: Luke, Kevin, Mr. Normand
Houston @ San Diego (-9)
I don't know how this happened, but I'm 7-0 on Houston Texans games. Go figure. Pick: San Diego
Mr. Normand throws a joke at Texans backup QB Sage Rosenfels, "I am not really a SAGE but going with the Chargers!"
Kevin does a good job of putting things in perspective, "Talk about not being a game about football at all. I sure hope the wildfires continue to die down/be put out. Something tells me the Chargers players will actually WANT to just play football this weekend, to not worry about their homes, etc. for a 3-4 hour period, though the opposite could happen just as easily."
HOU: Bart
SD: Luke, Sara, Devin, Kevin, Mr. Normand, Barnes
Jacksonville (-2.5) @ Tampa Bay
This spread does not do justice to the Jags QB Quinn Gray. I expect the Bucs to roll. Pick: Tampa Bay
Mr. Normand again follows my line of thinking as he expects the Bucs to beat up the Jags.
Kevin comes up with something that needs no introduction, "Have you seen this Gray guy pass the ball?? This game might be a Classic Browns score of 9-3. What's worse is I'm picking the former Brown, Jeff Garcia, to win the game. Is the world really ending?? Are the Browns 3-3?? Do I have any pants on??" For the second time this week, yes, these are my friends.
JAX: Sara, Devin
TB: Luke, Kevin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes
New Orleans (-3) @ San Francisco
The Saints have covered just one game this season, but it happened on the road. Probably had something to do with last years team not having a home. Pick: New Orleans
Mr. Normand cries for the Saints to finally win one for him this year. Well in all actuality, Mr. Normand shares the best record for the Saints with a 3-3 mark. Go figure.
These comments Kevin comes up with just keep getting better, "Alex Smith is back, but is not the reason why I'm taking the 49ers. Earlier this week I learned that the Australian National Basketball League team that plays in Adelaide is the 36ers. Have I seen them play?? No. But as you can probably tell from the Ballbuster Pick and Maxine Hunt pick, I don't put a whole lot of 'knowledge' into my choices." Yet he is in fourth place.
NO: Luke, Sara, Devin, Mr. Normand, Barnes
SF: Kevin, Bart
Washington @ New England (-16)
The Patriots are 7-0 on the season and 7-0 ATS. No one seems to think they can go 16-0 on both, but if there was one coach who wanted to stick it to everyone AND had the players to do it, it's Bill Belichick. To my surprise, I'm the only one to pick New England each week. Everyone else has picked against them at least twice. Thank you very much. Pick: New England
Mr. Normand says that he has been burned so far taking the points against the Patriots. He is 100% correct. Mr. Normand is 2-5 picking New England games. That hurts.
Kevin reminds us of a New England game a couple weeks ago, "Remember what happened when the Pats played the Cowboys, who supposedly had a great defense and would give New England fits?? A couple of good cornerbacks will not stop this team. My prediction for the score: NE 45, WASH 21."
WAS: Sara
NE: Luke, Devin, Kevin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes
Green Bay @ Denver (-3)
I don't know why, but I'm taking the Broncos. I guess I just don't think the Packers are well deserving of their 5-1 record. We'll see. Pick: Denver
Mr. Normand speaks for every Browns fan when he thanks the Broncos for beating the Steelers last week.
Kevin, which is the only person to have a winning record on Green Bay's games (5-1) says, "The Pack is getting points, I love it. The only thing that could pull down Green Bay this week is Brett Favre throwing the ball into bad situations while trying to prove to everyone that he still has a ton of arm strength. Well, that and the fact that DeShawn Wynn needs to show up in the Packers' running game. I just hope Favre throws nine interceptions and still wins, it would be classic."
GB: Kevin, Bart
DEN: Luke, Sara, Devin, Mr. Normand, Barnes
That's it for this week. Grothaus failed to get his picks in which causes some concern. Apparently no one has seen or heard from Grothaus since the Indians collapse. Go figure.
Bart does not have any thoughts for the week although I do know that he dressed up as Nacho Libre for Halloween. Fitting indeed.
Kevin however does have a message for Bart, "We are probably the worst two people at picking the 'Boring Game of the Week.' Mine ended up being a high scoring affair and his (Bengals-Jets) actually came down to the fourth quarter as well. We should just stop, it would do us a world of good." Gotta love it.
Allright, best of luck to everyone and GO BROWNS!!
Until next time, "read it, roll it, hole it."
Sunday, October 21, 2007
2007 NFL Picks Week Seven
There is only one word that can accurately describe the theme of this post.
Excitement.
I am excited for many different reasons, but the mere fact that they have all culminated in one week makes for well, an exciting post.
Let's start with the Cleveland Indians. Granted they did blow a 3-1 series lead on the Red Sox, but they still have a chance to win tonight in a do-or-die game seven. Doesn't get too much more exciting than that.
The Cleveland Browns entered their bye week this year with a 3-3 record. After their opening day display I would have thought that to be impossible. It makes these next couple games they play quite exciting.
I went 9-4 last week in these picks, which just so happened to be the best record for week six. That puts me in a tie with Sara for first place. You can feel the excitement in the air.
Lastly, I'm registering for classes at Ohio University on Friday for the first time in over a year. Albeit a very simple thing, for me, it's signifying the beginning of the end of my collegiate career. The goal is in sight, and I'm kick-starting that this Friday. Excitement.
For some, too much excitement is a bad thing and can ruin performances. Take J-RO for example. Whenever there was too much excitement this summer during our bowling league Jared was in trouble. Also out on the golf course it would cause Jared to miss that pretty simple putt. Being surrounded with an overload of excitement caused Jared's bowling scores to lower and raised his golfing scores.
I'm also very excited to write this post. Not for my comments but to show the world the comments made by everyone else. We have another Maxine Hunt pick as well as Bart's thoughts for the week.
Like I said, excitement.
STANDINGS (after six weeks)
1) Sara 48-41 (8-5)
1) Luke 48-41 (9-4)
3) Devin 45-44 (7-6)
4) Grothaus 44-45 (5-8)
5) Mr. Normand 43-46 (6-7)
5) Kevin 43-46 (8-5)
7) Bart 42-47 (6-7)
8) Barnes 40-49 (7-6)
Here we go.
Arizona @ Washington (-7)
Well so maybe the excitement does not carry over into some of these week seven games. However, I feel the need to make the best out of a crappy situation and/or game this week.
There should be some level of excitement for this game just simply to see how Tim Rattay will handle the reigns at quarterback this week for the Cardinals. I'm a believer that Cleveland has had some raw breaks but these Arizona Cardinals can make the same argument. They entered the season with very little worries at the QB position. Now, just six weeks in, they have Tim Rattay starting. Ouch.
These Washington Redskins gave away their game last week against the Packers and should be ready to win this game convincingly. Pick: Washington
Let the best week for comments by far begin.
Bart starts out on a great note, "If any more quarterbacks get hurt Arizona will be giving Randy Johnson a call. You heard it from me first." Seriously, this might be an option at this point.
Kevin decides that the Cardinals will have some NLCS carry over, "Arizona got swept by the Rockies, so they obviously won't cover seven against the Redskins." That's one way to look at it.
Sara manages to divert my attention for a bit, "For those of you who haven't seen ... DO check out Chris Cooley's player page on sportsline.com. You won't regret it."
Mr. Normand follows my line of thinking, "Rattay, give me a break."
ARI: No one
WAS: Everyone
Atlanta @ New Orleans (-8.5)
The Saints finally showed up last week beating the Seahawks. The question is if that type of performance will continue. On the other hand, the Atlanta Falcons are starting Byron Leftwich at QB. I can not trust this New Orleans team until they show some consistency. So, believe it or not, I'm backing Leftwich in this one. I mean what's more exciting than backing Leftwich. Not much. Pick: Atlanta
Mr. Normand feels that New Orleans is ready to roll, "The Breeses are starting to bring the heat." We'll see.
Bart puts things in perspective, "Leftwich will help the Falcons, which is not really saying much because I don’t think that they can get much worse." True story.
Kevin looks back at his past comments which causes some unintentional humor, "I think somewhere in Week One I made this joke: 'Vince Young runs rampant, while Byron Leftwich laughs while watching the game with fellow recently-released quarterback Vinny Testaverde. Meanwhile, Testaverde cracks jokes about the 70s and Leftwich has no clue what he's talking about.' All of a sudden six weeks later they're both playing again. If Vinny had a game this week, I would pick both of them to win. I thought that line was pretty funny for a week one quote and now it's even better." Strong candidate for quote of the week.
ATL: Sara, Luke, Kevin, Grothaus
NO: Devin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes
Baltimore (-3) @ Buffalo
This game was a difficult one for me to pick. For one, Baltimore has been playing decent but not really beating good teams. On the other hand, three points is not that much. However, the Bills have been covering at home ALL season. I'm going to follow the #1 rule in gambling and pick the Bills until they fail to cover in Buffalo. Pick: Buffalo
Sara is absolutely correct when she says, "Buffalo will try and try to give away this game at the end, too, but it'll get bailed out because I can't think of anything more pathetic than the Ravens' offense." Baltimore can not physically complete a play for more than 12 yards. Look it up.
Mr. Normand shows his true colors, "I'm rooting against my own pick here." Go Browns.
Bart chooses to keep things simple, "The Bills suck." Yeah, but I don't think Baltimore is that much better.
Kevin's Ballbuster Pick of the Week (1-4): Baltimore
Kevin decided to take the third game listed and take the team who came up first alphabetically. But first Kevin would spell the team mascot's backwards and go from there. Wow.
"snevaR @ slliB -- I've seriously hit some lows with these. I think I might have to just revert back to picking the games randomly. It's so complicated that I have to write everything out beforehand." While that is probably true, the more complicated Hunt makes these things, the better his chances to pick the winner.
BAL: Devin, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Bart, Grothaus
BUF: Sara, Luke, Barnes
Minnesota @ Dallas (-9.5)
Memo to the Cowboys last week: "Welcome to the AFC. Where actual good teams play." Dallas stays at home this week to face the all of a sudden dangerous Minnesota Vikings. Tavaris Jackson was the happiest person alive last week when Adrian Peterson ran for over 200 yards and three TD's. However, look for Dallas to come out and make Jackson beat them. Pick: Dallas
Mr. Normand thinks the Cowboys will be able to rebound from last week, "The 'boys come back from a whoopin'." If Dallas loses this game the Giants might be the best team in the NFC right now. God help us.
Maxine Hunt Pick of the Week (1-0): Dallas
"This was her exact thoughts on the pick ...
Mom: This week while i was at bodyworks, I saw the Dallas Cowboy cheerleader competition on CMT.
Mom: How's that for a reason?
She's 1-0, so I can't complain. But it was based on a country music channel, so we'll see."
Bart tells all of us where his true passion lies, "I already ate all of my popcorn, so I think I am gonna get my Lemon Heads ready instead." Yes, these are my friends.
MIN: Bart, Grothaus
DAL: Sara, Luke, Devin, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Barnes
New England (-17) @ Miami
New England is awesome. They are very very good. However, they have a history of not playing well at Miami. If EVER there was a week where I would pick against the Patriots, this would be the week. Pick: New England
Bart puts it best regarding Miami trading Chris Chambers for a 2nd round draft pick, "I don’t think getting rid of Chris Chambers is going to help them win games this year, or ever."
Sara thinks outside the box, "I just learned this week that there are officially TWO Brady's on the Patriots (the other being the back-up tight end, Kyle). 2x("Brady") + NE = Patriots beating the rest of their schedule by a zillion points instead of 1,000." It's crazy to think that this might ACTUALLY happen.
Kevin doesn't see the 17 points (which is the biggest spread we've seen yet this year) as a problem for New Engalnd, "You do realize the Browns had a 17-point lead on Miami until the Dolphins scored with under 2 minutes to go?? Wes Welker big game against his former team."
Mr. Normand disagrees, "17 points is a lot, anyone giving me more (28)?" Sorry about your luck.
NE: Sara, Luke, Devin, Kevin, Bart
MIA: Mr. Normand, Barnes, Grothaus
San Francisco @ New York Giants (-9)
The G-Men are on a roll, which is a sure sign that they are going to fall off here soon. That's just what the Giants do. They look good for a while but then stink it up when everyone starts backing them. Eli Manning does much better when everyone thinks that he's not that good. When people start liking him, he falls under the pressure and dare I say it, the excitement surrounding him. Pick: San Francisco
Bart gets strong consideration for quote of the week, "San Francisco doesn’t have enough offense or straight people in the city to have a good team." For the second time this week, yes these are my friends.
Mr. Normand is sorry he bet on Gore to win the rushing title this year. It's scary to think Adrian Peterson has a chance to win that title. I'm still furious the Browns passed him over at #3.
Kevin sums things up nicely, "The Giants are at home and Trent Dilfer is starting for the 49ers. The reason Dilfer was anything with the Ravens was because their defense covered up his awfulness." Apparently Kevin is forgetting Dilfer's wonder years with Cleveland.
SF: Luke, Barnes, Grothaus
NYG: Sara, Devin, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Bart
Tampa Bay @ Detroit (-2)
Still have no idea about either of these teams. The Lions are getting healthy this week when Calvin Johnson comes back. The Bucs barely beat Tennessee last week while the Lions had a bye week. I'll take the fresh team to win by a field goal. Pick: Detroit
Sara is glad that football players wear helmets, "Jeff Garcia + Jon Kitna = two pretty ugly dudes."
Kevin sees a Lions disaster, "Detroit defense gives this one away in the late stages of the game and Jon Kitna blows his top." We'll see.
Devin meanwhile picks Tampa Bay and wonders if it should even be allowed.
Mr. Normand follows my line of thinking, "I'm still not sure how good or bad either of these teams are." Welcome to the NFC. This could be a playoff preview for all we know.
TB: Sara, Devin, Kevin, Bart, Barnes
DET: Luke, Mr. Normand, Grothaus
Tennessee (-1) @ Houston
Is Vince Young going to play? Is Andre Johnson going to play? Well, as I write this the latter is definitely not playing. Like I've said before Johnson just makes Houston go. Without him they will fail to win this game. Even without Vince Young the Titans have a good enough defense to win this. Pick: Tennessee
Mr. Normand says exactly what I just got done saying, "Love their [Ten] defense, will Young play?" Great minds think alike.
Kevin hopes that Vince Young does not try to do too much to show off in Houston.
TEN: Luke, Devin, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Grothaus
HOU: Sara, Bart, Barnes
Kansas City @ Oakland (-3)
I heart Herm Edwards. It's really that simple. Larry Johnson is finally starting to do something and Kansas City all of a sudden doesn't look that bad. I expect this game to be close and will take the points accordingly. Pick: Kansas City
Kevin says it correctly, "Larry Johnson is going to start gathering yards now. His 'preseason' is over." True story.
Mr. Normand believes that Johnson woke up against the Bengals. Who Dey!!
KC: Sara, Luke, Devin, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Bart, Barnes
OAK: Grothaus
New York Jets @ Cincinnati (-6)
When did the Bengals get so bad? It feels all of a sudden. They won their opening week game against the Ravens and then just fell a part. They haven't won another game since. Maybe they all had to do community service at the same time and their focus slipped a bit on the field. I really don't know. However, the key to winning these things are to pick up on trends before they happen. Here's to hoping I get this one right. Pick: Cincinnati
Bart makes another provisional pick, which I will allow based on his provisions, "I am picking whoever wears the darker uniform for this game. Other than that I have no comment on this game because I think this may win the 'Boring Game of the Year Award.'" Gotta love it.
Sara has a great point, "Apparently the Bengals are playing with better teamwork now, says Marvin Lewis. Sounds like the words of a coach on the hot seat."
NYJ: Bart, Grothaus
CIN: Sara, Luke, Devin, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Bart, Barnes
Chicago @ Philadelphia (-5)
Are the Chicago Bulls better than the Philadelphia 76ers? Absolutely.
Are the Chicago Cubs better than the Philadelphia Phillies? They both got swept, but the Phillies opponent is still in it.
Would I rather travel to the Windy City or the City of Brotherly Love? Windy City, no question.
Go Bulls. Pick: Chicago
Bart keeps the ongoing theme running, "The movie still has not gotten any better, but the team has, a little." I love it.
Kevin throws in his hat for quote of the week, "Because Mike Golic said he'd be there stuffing his face with cheese steaks. Dan Marino and the folks at Nutrisystem, meanwhile, are ticked." Not a good year for Marino. Favre breaks his records, the Dolphins won't win a game and now this. He is completely miserable.
CHI: Luke, Devin, Grothaus
PHI: Sara, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Bart, Barnes
St. Louis @ Seattle (-8.5)
As Bill Simmons put it, "I hate the Seahawks." I agree. More importantly I hate Mr. Alexander. He has killed my fantasy team the last two weeks. So here it is. If he struggles again this week I'm done with him. Completely done. I'll trade him for rubbish because that is exactly what Alexander has become. However, this Rams team is pathetic. Pick: Seattle
Bart tells it like it is, "Marc Bulger is dumb."
Mr. Normand wonders if the Rams can stay this bad forever. To answer his question: if by forever you mean the rest of this year, then yes.
Kevin however still has hope, "Marc Bulger is coming back and I didn't like anything I saw out of Seattle's defense last week. The Rams will at least keep it close, even without Steven Jackson." When I first read this it made me like my pick a lot more.
STL: Mr. Normand, Kevin, Grothaus
SEA: Sara, Luke, Devin, Bart, Barnes
Pittsburgh (-3.5) @ Denver
When I first saw this game I guessed the spread would be around (-8) for Pittsburgh. However I was quite surprised to see it down to the current (-3.5). This makes me question if the oddsmakers know something I don't. I do know that Denver is not very good this year. I do know that Pittsburgh is better than the Broncos. Both teams are coming off a bye week and as much as I want to back the Broncos, I can't afford to give away games right now. Pick: Pittsburgh
Sara, as her father did earlier, shows her true colors, "Pittsburgh sucks."
Kevin comes through with THE quote of the week, "This is Denver's last chance to keep fans from leaving Invesco Field and heading to Coors Field. It could also be Travis Henry's second-to-last game at Invesco for a year. I would use the name 'Mile High Stadium' in this situation just because Henry is likely to be suspended for marijuana charges, but I still hate John Elway. And Ernest Byner. But Elway more." Congrats Hunt. This was a tough week to win it.
Mr. Normand picks the Broncos but simply because he too hates the Steelers. I'm a big fan of family ties, especially when the Browns are involved.
PIT: Sara, Luke, Devin, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
DEN: Mr. Normand, Kevin
Indianapolis (-3) @ Jacksonville
These are two very good teams doing battle on Monday Night Football. The key here will be Peyton Manning. Manning always performs well on MNF and I expect him to do the same here this week. The Colts are fresh, as they had a bye week last week and their stars are starting to get healthy. Don't be surprised if this comes down to the last few minutes, but the Colts will come away with the win and the cover. Pick: Indianapolis
Kevin expects the same thing as me, "NEW ENGLAND IS THE BEST TEAM IN THE ENTIRE WORLD!! Oh yeah, Indy didn't play last week. I guess by luck they just don't get publicity. I look for the 'O' and the 'D' to come out in full force on Monday Night." New England IS the best team Hunt, but the Colts are 2nd, no doubt.
Mr. Normand also picks the Colts because their weapons are healing.
IND: Everyone
JAX: No one
That wraps it up for week seven. My apologies for not posting this until 1:45. These picks were all made and the column was ready to go I just simply forgot that I had not posted it yet.
I can't think of a more exciting and/or fitting way to end this post than with the return of Bart's Thoughts of the Week. Enjoy.
"Let me start off by saying sorry to all of the fans of my comments, my computer has been broke for the last two weeks therefore making it hard to send emails. To the other seven billion people in the world, you are going to have to start suffering through them again. Kevin you were definitely wrong last week with your 'Boring Game of the Week' pick, I mean, I don’t know what you look for but, a medium amount of scoring by both teams, a rookie running back with more than 200 yards and 3 TDs, Devin Hester (need I say more?), and a last second field goal to win the game, does not constitute boring in my book. Nice pick Kevin. That’s all I got. Good luck to Sunderland of the English Premier Soccer League, they will be facing West Ham United on Sunday in a very tough road match."
Best of luck to everyone and GO TRIBE!!!
"Read it, roll it, hole it."
Excitement.
I am excited for many different reasons, but the mere fact that they have all culminated in one week makes for well, an exciting post.
Let's start with the Cleveland Indians. Granted they did blow a 3-1 series lead on the Red Sox, but they still have a chance to win tonight in a do-or-die game seven. Doesn't get too much more exciting than that.
The Cleveland Browns entered their bye week this year with a 3-3 record. After their opening day display I would have thought that to be impossible. It makes these next couple games they play quite exciting.
I went 9-4 last week in these picks, which just so happened to be the best record for week six. That puts me in a tie with Sara for first place. You can feel the excitement in the air.
Lastly, I'm registering for classes at Ohio University on Friday for the first time in over a year. Albeit a very simple thing, for me, it's signifying the beginning of the end of my collegiate career. The goal is in sight, and I'm kick-starting that this Friday. Excitement.
For some, too much excitement is a bad thing and can ruin performances. Take J-RO for example. Whenever there was too much excitement this summer during our bowling league Jared was in trouble. Also out on the golf course it would cause Jared to miss that pretty simple putt. Being surrounded with an overload of excitement caused Jared's bowling scores to lower and raised his golfing scores.
I'm also very excited to write this post. Not for my comments but to show the world the comments made by everyone else. We have another Maxine Hunt pick as well as Bart's thoughts for the week.
Like I said, excitement.
STANDINGS (after six weeks)
1) Sara 48-41 (8-5)
1) Luke 48-41 (9-4)
3) Devin 45-44 (7-6)
4) Grothaus 44-45 (5-8)
5) Mr. Normand 43-46 (6-7)
5) Kevin 43-46 (8-5)
7) Bart 42-47 (6-7)
8) Barnes 40-49 (7-6)
Here we go.
Arizona @ Washington (-7)
Well so maybe the excitement does not carry over into some of these week seven games. However, I feel the need to make the best out of a crappy situation and/or game this week.
There should be some level of excitement for this game just simply to see how Tim Rattay will handle the reigns at quarterback this week for the Cardinals. I'm a believer that Cleveland has had some raw breaks but these Arizona Cardinals can make the same argument. They entered the season with very little worries at the QB position. Now, just six weeks in, they have Tim Rattay starting. Ouch.
These Washington Redskins gave away their game last week against the Packers and should be ready to win this game convincingly. Pick: Washington
Let the best week for comments by far begin.
Bart starts out on a great note, "If any more quarterbacks get hurt Arizona will be giving Randy Johnson a call. You heard it from me first." Seriously, this might be an option at this point.
Kevin decides that the Cardinals will have some NLCS carry over, "Arizona got swept by the Rockies, so they obviously won't cover seven against the Redskins." That's one way to look at it.
Sara manages to divert my attention for a bit, "For those of you who haven't seen ... DO check out Chris Cooley's player page on sportsline.com. You won't regret it."
Mr. Normand follows my line of thinking, "Rattay, give me a break."
ARI: No one
WAS: Everyone
Atlanta @ New Orleans (-8.5)
The Saints finally showed up last week beating the Seahawks. The question is if that type of performance will continue. On the other hand, the Atlanta Falcons are starting Byron Leftwich at QB. I can not trust this New Orleans team until they show some consistency. So, believe it or not, I'm backing Leftwich in this one. I mean what's more exciting than backing Leftwich. Not much. Pick: Atlanta
Mr. Normand feels that New Orleans is ready to roll, "The Breeses are starting to bring the heat." We'll see.
Bart puts things in perspective, "Leftwich will help the Falcons, which is not really saying much because I don’t think that they can get much worse." True story.
Kevin looks back at his past comments which causes some unintentional humor, "I think somewhere in Week One I made this joke: 'Vince Young runs rampant, while Byron Leftwich laughs while watching the game with fellow recently-released quarterback Vinny Testaverde. Meanwhile, Testaverde cracks jokes about the 70s and Leftwich has no clue what he's talking about.' All of a sudden six weeks later they're both playing again. If Vinny had a game this week, I would pick both of them to win. I thought that line was pretty funny for a week one quote and now it's even better." Strong candidate for quote of the week.
ATL: Sara, Luke, Kevin, Grothaus
NO: Devin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes
Baltimore (-3) @ Buffalo
This game was a difficult one for me to pick. For one, Baltimore has been playing decent but not really beating good teams. On the other hand, three points is not that much. However, the Bills have been covering at home ALL season. I'm going to follow the #1 rule in gambling and pick the Bills until they fail to cover in Buffalo. Pick: Buffalo
Sara is absolutely correct when she says, "Buffalo will try and try to give away this game at the end, too, but it'll get bailed out because I can't think of anything more pathetic than the Ravens' offense." Baltimore can not physically complete a play for more than 12 yards. Look it up.
Mr. Normand shows his true colors, "I'm rooting against my own pick here." Go Browns.
Bart chooses to keep things simple, "The Bills suck." Yeah, but I don't think Baltimore is that much better.
Kevin's Ballbuster Pick of the Week (1-4): Baltimore
Kevin decided to take the third game listed and take the team who came up first alphabetically. But first Kevin would spell the team mascot's backwards and go from there. Wow.
"snevaR @ slliB -- I've seriously hit some lows with these. I think I might have to just revert back to picking the games randomly. It's so complicated that I have to write everything out beforehand." While that is probably true, the more complicated Hunt makes these things, the better his chances to pick the winner.
BAL: Devin, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Bart, Grothaus
BUF: Sara, Luke, Barnes
Minnesota @ Dallas (-9.5)
Memo to the Cowboys last week: "Welcome to the AFC. Where actual good teams play." Dallas stays at home this week to face the all of a sudden dangerous Minnesota Vikings. Tavaris Jackson was the happiest person alive last week when Adrian Peterson ran for over 200 yards and three TD's. However, look for Dallas to come out and make Jackson beat them. Pick: Dallas
Mr. Normand thinks the Cowboys will be able to rebound from last week, "The 'boys come back from a whoopin'." If Dallas loses this game the Giants might be the best team in the NFC right now. God help us.
Maxine Hunt Pick of the Week (1-0): Dallas
"This was her exact thoughts on the pick ...
Mom: This week while i was at bodyworks, I saw the Dallas Cowboy cheerleader competition on CMT.
Mom: How's that for a reason?
She's 1-0, so I can't complain. But it was based on a country music channel, so we'll see."
Bart tells all of us where his true passion lies, "I already ate all of my popcorn, so I think I am gonna get my Lemon Heads ready instead." Yes, these are my friends.
MIN: Bart, Grothaus
DAL: Sara, Luke, Devin, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Barnes
New England (-17) @ Miami
New England is awesome. They are very very good. However, they have a history of not playing well at Miami. If EVER there was a week where I would pick against the Patriots, this would be the week. Pick: New England
Bart puts it best regarding Miami trading Chris Chambers for a 2nd round draft pick, "I don’t think getting rid of Chris Chambers is going to help them win games this year, or ever."
Sara thinks outside the box, "I just learned this week that there are officially TWO Brady's on the Patriots (the other being the back-up tight end, Kyle). 2x("Brady") + NE = Patriots beating the rest of their schedule by a zillion points instead of 1,000." It's crazy to think that this might ACTUALLY happen.
Kevin doesn't see the 17 points (which is the biggest spread we've seen yet this year) as a problem for New Engalnd, "You do realize the Browns had a 17-point lead on Miami until the Dolphins scored with under 2 minutes to go?? Wes Welker big game against his former team."
Mr. Normand disagrees, "17 points is a lot, anyone giving me more (28)?" Sorry about your luck.
NE: Sara, Luke, Devin, Kevin, Bart
MIA: Mr. Normand, Barnes, Grothaus
San Francisco @ New York Giants (-9)
The G-Men are on a roll, which is a sure sign that they are going to fall off here soon. That's just what the Giants do. They look good for a while but then stink it up when everyone starts backing them. Eli Manning does much better when everyone thinks that he's not that good. When people start liking him, he falls under the pressure and dare I say it, the excitement surrounding him. Pick: San Francisco
Bart gets strong consideration for quote of the week, "San Francisco doesn’t have enough offense or straight people in the city to have a good team." For the second time this week, yes these are my friends.
Mr. Normand is sorry he bet on Gore to win the rushing title this year. It's scary to think Adrian Peterson has a chance to win that title. I'm still furious the Browns passed him over at #3.
Kevin sums things up nicely, "The Giants are at home and Trent Dilfer is starting for the 49ers. The reason Dilfer was anything with the Ravens was because their defense covered up his awfulness." Apparently Kevin is forgetting Dilfer's wonder years with Cleveland.
SF: Luke, Barnes, Grothaus
NYG: Sara, Devin, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Bart
Tampa Bay @ Detroit (-2)
Still have no idea about either of these teams. The Lions are getting healthy this week when Calvin Johnson comes back. The Bucs barely beat Tennessee last week while the Lions had a bye week. I'll take the fresh team to win by a field goal. Pick: Detroit
Sara is glad that football players wear helmets, "Jeff Garcia + Jon Kitna = two pretty ugly dudes."
Kevin sees a Lions disaster, "Detroit defense gives this one away in the late stages of the game and Jon Kitna blows his top." We'll see.
Devin meanwhile picks Tampa Bay and wonders if it should even be allowed.
Mr. Normand follows my line of thinking, "I'm still not sure how good or bad either of these teams are." Welcome to the NFC. This could be a playoff preview for all we know.
TB: Sara, Devin, Kevin, Bart, Barnes
DET: Luke, Mr. Normand, Grothaus
Tennessee (-1) @ Houston
Is Vince Young going to play? Is Andre Johnson going to play? Well, as I write this the latter is definitely not playing. Like I've said before Johnson just makes Houston go. Without him they will fail to win this game. Even without Vince Young the Titans have a good enough defense to win this. Pick: Tennessee
Mr. Normand says exactly what I just got done saying, "Love their [Ten] defense, will Young play?" Great minds think alike.
Kevin hopes that Vince Young does not try to do too much to show off in Houston.
TEN: Luke, Devin, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Grothaus
HOU: Sara, Bart, Barnes
Kansas City @ Oakland (-3)
I heart Herm Edwards. It's really that simple. Larry Johnson is finally starting to do something and Kansas City all of a sudden doesn't look that bad. I expect this game to be close and will take the points accordingly. Pick: Kansas City
Kevin says it correctly, "Larry Johnson is going to start gathering yards now. His 'preseason' is over." True story.
Mr. Normand believes that Johnson woke up against the Bengals. Who Dey!!
KC: Sara, Luke, Devin, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Bart, Barnes
OAK: Grothaus
New York Jets @ Cincinnati (-6)
When did the Bengals get so bad? It feels all of a sudden. They won their opening week game against the Ravens and then just fell a part. They haven't won another game since. Maybe they all had to do community service at the same time and their focus slipped a bit on the field. I really don't know. However, the key to winning these things are to pick up on trends before they happen. Here's to hoping I get this one right. Pick: Cincinnati
Bart makes another provisional pick, which I will allow based on his provisions, "I am picking whoever wears the darker uniform for this game. Other than that I have no comment on this game because I think this may win the 'Boring Game of the Year Award.'" Gotta love it.
Sara has a great point, "Apparently the Bengals are playing with better teamwork now, says Marvin Lewis. Sounds like the words of a coach on the hot seat."
NYJ: Bart, Grothaus
CIN: Sara, Luke, Devin, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Bart, Barnes
Chicago @ Philadelphia (-5)
Are the Chicago Bulls better than the Philadelphia 76ers? Absolutely.
Are the Chicago Cubs better than the Philadelphia Phillies? They both got swept, but the Phillies opponent is still in it.
Would I rather travel to the Windy City or the City of Brotherly Love? Windy City, no question.
Go Bulls. Pick: Chicago
Bart keeps the ongoing theme running, "The movie still has not gotten any better, but the team has, a little." I love it.
Kevin throws in his hat for quote of the week, "Because Mike Golic said he'd be there stuffing his face with cheese steaks. Dan Marino and the folks at Nutrisystem, meanwhile, are ticked." Not a good year for Marino. Favre breaks his records, the Dolphins won't win a game and now this. He is completely miserable.
CHI: Luke, Devin, Grothaus
PHI: Sara, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Bart, Barnes
St. Louis @ Seattle (-8.5)
As Bill Simmons put it, "I hate the Seahawks." I agree. More importantly I hate Mr. Alexander. He has killed my fantasy team the last two weeks. So here it is. If he struggles again this week I'm done with him. Completely done. I'll trade him for rubbish because that is exactly what Alexander has become. However, this Rams team is pathetic. Pick: Seattle
Bart tells it like it is, "Marc Bulger is dumb."
Mr. Normand wonders if the Rams can stay this bad forever. To answer his question: if by forever you mean the rest of this year, then yes.
Kevin however still has hope, "Marc Bulger is coming back and I didn't like anything I saw out of Seattle's defense last week. The Rams will at least keep it close, even without Steven Jackson." When I first read this it made me like my pick a lot more.
STL: Mr. Normand, Kevin, Grothaus
SEA: Sara, Luke, Devin, Bart, Barnes
Pittsburgh (-3.5) @ Denver
When I first saw this game I guessed the spread would be around (-8) for Pittsburgh. However I was quite surprised to see it down to the current (-3.5). This makes me question if the oddsmakers know something I don't. I do know that Denver is not very good this year. I do know that Pittsburgh is better than the Broncos. Both teams are coming off a bye week and as much as I want to back the Broncos, I can't afford to give away games right now. Pick: Pittsburgh
Sara, as her father did earlier, shows her true colors, "Pittsburgh sucks."
Kevin comes through with THE quote of the week, "This is Denver's last chance to keep fans from leaving Invesco Field and heading to Coors Field. It could also be Travis Henry's second-to-last game at Invesco for a year. I would use the name 'Mile High Stadium' in this situation just because Henry is likely to be suspended for marijuana charges, but I still hate John Elway. And Ernest Byner. But Elway more." Congrats Hunt. This was a tough week to win it.
Mr. Normand picks the Broncos but simply because he too hates the Steelers. I'm a big fan of family ties, especially when the Browns are involved.
PIT: Sara, Luke, Devin, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
DEN: Mr. Normand, Kevin
Indianapolis (-3) @ Jacksonville
These are two very good teams doing battle on Monday Night Football. The key here will be Peyton Manning. Manning always performs well on MNF and I expect him to do the same here this week. The Colts are fresh, as they had a bye week last week and their stars are starting to get healthy. Don't be surprised if this comes down to the last few minutes, but the Colts will come away with the win and the cover. Pick: Indianapolis
Kevin expects the same thing as me, "NEW ENGLAND IS THE BEST TEAM IN THE ENTIRE WORLD!! Oh yeah, Indy didn't play last week. I guess by luck they just don't get publicity. I look for the 'O' and the 'D' to come out in full force on Monday Night." New England IS the best team Hunt, but the Colts are 2nd, no doubt.
Mr. Normand also picks the Colts because their weapons are healing.
IND: Everyone
JAX: No one
That wraps it up for week seven. My apologies for not posting this until 1:45. These picks were all made and the column was ready to go I just simply forgot that I had not posted it yet.
I can't think of a more exciting and/or fitting way to end this post than with the return of Bart's Thoughts of the Week. Enjoy.
"Let me start off by saying sorry to all of the fans of my comments, my computer has been broke for the last two weeks therefore making it hard to send emails. To the other seven billion people in the world, you are going to have to start suffering through them again. Kevin you were definitely wrong last week with your 'Boring Game of the Week' pick, I mean, I don’t know what you look for but, a medium amount of scoring by both teams, a rookie running back with more than 200 yards and 3 TDs, Devin Hester (need I say more?), and a last second field goal to win the game, does not constitute boring in my book. Nice pick Kevin. That’s all I got. Good luck to Sunderland of the English Premier Soccer League, they will be facing West Ham United on Sunday in a very tough road match."
Best of luck to everyone and GO TRIBE!!!
"Read it, roll it, hole it."
Sunday, October 14, 2007
2007 NFL Picks Week Six
The common theme this week is the simple fact that there are a lot of awful NFL teams. We are at the point now in the NFL regular season where teams are beginning to establish themselves as either a contender or a pretender. Entering week six it is safe to say there are four really good teams, three to four just “regular” good teams, and the rest are unpleasant at best. So, instead of talking about some of these awful teams and their match-ups this week I will talk about other things I have on my mind. The main reason I am doing this is for my own personal safety. Seriously, talking about how Vinny Testaverde and Kurt Warner are facing each other this week might make me hurt myself. On we go.
Congratulations to Bart for winning week four in a tiebreaker over Sara. Week five did not render a double-digit winner but Grothaus was able to win nine games to take home the week. Here are the standings after five weeks.
STANDINGS
1) Sara 40-36 (5-9)
2) Luke 39-37 (7-7)
2) Grothaus 39-37 (9-5)
4) Devin 38-38 (8-6)
5) Mr. Normand 37-39 (3-11)
6) Bart 36-40 (8-6)
7) Kevin 35-41 (5-9)
8) Barnes 33-43 (7-7)
Giddy up.
Cincinnati (-3) @ Kansas City
The Cleveland Indians played a five hour marathon last night in Game Two of the ALCS against the Boston Red Sox. It was a game the Indians had to win. Facing the daunting challenge of having to beat Boston in four out of five games to win the series would have been almost impossible. The Indians managed to split the first two games despite having C.C. Sabathia and Fausto Carmona fail to get out of the fifth inning. The series will be determined at Jacobs Field where the next three games are being played. Whoever wins the majority of games in Cleveland should be in full control to represent the American League in the World Series. Pick: Cincinnati
Hunt, who has a full slate of comments to enjoy this week begins with, “I have no comment on this game. My only thing to say is Happy Birthday to Luke, who turned 22 on Thursday. We may only be getting older, but hey, who isn't these days??” Thanks Hunt for the birthday wishes and for giving me some ammunition to use for one of these crappy games. Mr. Normand picks the Bengals but admits he has no faith in Cincy. Devin meanwhile forecasts a big game for Chad Johnson.
CIN: Luke, Devin, Mr. Normand, Barnes, Grothaus
KC: Sara, Bart, Kevin
Houston @ Jacksonville (-6.5)
Hey, an actual decent game! In all actuality this game could be a lot better if Texan WR Andre Johnson would be playing. This is his fourth straight week he will have missed. The Texans are 1-2 so far without his services. As far as Jacksonville goes they are one Vince Young TD drive away from being 4-0. Don’t look now but this AFC South is suddenly the best conference in football. Six and a half points might be too much for Jacksonville, but until Houston gets completely healthy I’ll take my chances with the Jaguars. Pick: Jacksonville
Hunt wants a short scoring contest, “The Jags D is allowing the second-fewest points per game, so I'm basically hoping it's a 9-3 final. Although, Maurice Jones-Drew might account for the entire spread himself.” Devin decides to take matters to a higher power by flipping a coin.
HOU: Devin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Kevin, Grothaus
JAX: Sara, Luke, Barnes
Miami @ Cleveland (-4.5)
Uh oh. The Browns take the field in a game that they should win. They are playing at home AND facing a winless Dolphin team. Everything points to the Dolphins. However, I liked what I saw last week in New England. The Browns turned the ball over three times and still were only down by ten points with under a minute remaining. That is a good sign. Do you think Cam Cameron would like to have that draft pick back? Pick: Cleveland
Sara follows my line of thinking, “If he hasn't done it already, Cam Cameron should be punching himself in the face at this point for not taking Brady Quinn in this year's draft.” Kevin provides what could have been a great tiebreaker question for this week, “Bonus point should be given to person who can correctly pick the over/under on number of times CBS shows Brady Quinn during the broadcast. My guess: 75.” Hunt, I’m taking your number and adding a 0 to the end of it. Devin goes against one of his rules and picks the Browns and hopes for a big win. Mr. Normand chooses to keep it simple, “Cleveland Rocks!” True story.
MIA: Bart, Barnes
CLE: Sara, Luke, Devin, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Grothaus
Minnesota @ Chicago (-5.5)
I’ve said it before, and I’m sure I will say it again. TAVARIS JACKSON ON THE ROAD!! TAVARIS JACKSON ON THE ROAD!! Pick: Chicago
Hunt feels like I do at the beginning of this post and decides to put a name to this battle, “In what I hope will be a continuing trend, I name this game my Boring Game of the Week. The only thing keeping both teams from running on every down is the fact that Minnesota has the top ranked run defense. So Chicago will have to throw every once in awhile, which, with Brian Griese under center, will probably just mean a lot of incompletions.” Devin believes Chicago is going to go on a roll, while Mr. Normand thinks Kelly Holcomb looks bad at Minnesota too.
MIN: Bart
CHI: Sara, Luke, Devin, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Barnes, Grothaus
Philadelphia (-3) @ New York Jets
Yes, Kevin is correct. I did turn 22 this past Thursday. I really don’t think it has sunk in that I am actually 22 years old. I have a hard time believing that I am older than most of the college football players I watch every Saturday afternoon. Not gonna lie, I only feel like a 17 year old kid. Which I guess isn’t a bad thing. I’m currently putting the over/under on the age where I don’t have to show my ID to buy beer at 35. Pick: Philadelphia
Sara comes up with an interesting way to decide the winner, “I can't think of two quarterbacks with more pressure on them than the ones from these two teams. But Chad Pennington doesn't have chunky soup.” She has a point.
KEVIN’S BALLBUSTER PICK OF THE WEEK (0-4): Philadelphia
“Ballbuster Pick of the Week. At this point, I'm following along the lines of my game comments by trying to think up the most ridiculous things I can. I hope it's working.” And what follows is how Kevin came up with this pick.
“5th game listed, whichever team has a #25 on roster -- if both have one, choose the team whose #25 has a shorter last name. Pick: Philly's Reno Mahe over New York's Kerry Rhodes.” Here’s to hoping Hunt can get that first Ballbuster winning pick.
PHI: Sara, Luke, Devin, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Barnes, Grothaus
NYJ: Bart
St. Louis @ Baltimore (-9.5)
My Dad got me a new basketball hoop for my birthday. Putting up the hoop brought back memories of the day when Dad brought home the very first basketball hoop. I was around the age of six or seven and I remember a bunch of the neighborhood kids came over to help. That first hoop has seen it’s share of basketball shots. I would love to compile a list of all the people who took a shot at that first hoop. Great, great memories. Pick: Baltimore
Hunt says, “A close runner up for Boring Game of the Week.” Mr. Normand has a hard time believing that Baltimore can even score ten points.
STL: Sara, Mr. Normand, Bart, Grothaus
BAL: Luke, Devin “whatever”, Kevin, Barnes
Tennessee @ Tampa Bay (-2.5)
If anyone reading this has not watched “The Office” on NBC then you are missing out tremendously. However there is hope for those of you that have missed the first three episodes of season four. Hit up nbc.com and you can watch every episode online. My favorite character so far this season is Kevin. “You have got to be kidding me.” “I knew it.” Seriously, take some time and watch a couple episodes, you will fall in love just like I did. Pick: Tennessee
Hunt comes through with the quote of the week, “In another new addition to my picks, this is the Maxine Hunt pick of the week. I asked her to pick a number between 1 and 13 - she chose 7 which gives her this game. She took Tampa Bay because she knew their mascot right away. But immediately replied, ‘Although I did remember the Titan name later, so i guess that's where the point spread comes into play.’ This idea instantly turned out to be one of the better investments of my time.” Yes, these are my friends.
TEN: Sara, Luke, Devin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
TB: Kevin
Washington @ Green Bay (-3)
Welcome to the battle for the 2nd best team in the NFC. Seriously, these are the contenders. A 40 year old Brett Favre with absolutely no running game against Jason Campbell and Joe Gibbs. Adding fuel to the proverbial fire is the fact that FOX will be televising this game. Awesome. Pick: Washington
Hunt is making the following a reoccurring theme, “Back the Pack 'cause the Pack is back‘ ... this week after letting me down for the first time this year last week.” Does anyone else remember that Brett Favre poster in Mr. Stover’s class? I remember almost losing it when Nick Lay went up there to sharpen his pencil and made sexual gestures towards Favre’s “bulge.” Hilarious.
Devin believes that Green Bay is starting to go downhill while Mr. Normand loves #4.
WAS: Luke, Devin, Bart
GB: Sara, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Barnes, Grothaus
Carolina @ Arizona (-4)
The only thing worse than a David Carr vs. Kurt Warner game is one where you take out David Carr and replace him with Vinny Testaverde. Do you know who the last quarterback was that led the Cleveland Browns to a playoff game victory? The answer, Vinny. You can not make this up. Pick: Arizona
Hunt feels extra creative as he says, “I'll coin the new Kurt Warner descriptor as ‘The Hottest Show in the Desert.’ Since I've essentially copyrighted it, I'll only let people use it at the price of a beer per use. Thanks.” No Kevin, thank you. Mr. Normand sees Kurt Warner returning to his ‘99 form, “Warner comeback continues.”
CAR: Devin, Bart
ARZ: Sara, Luke, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Barnes, Grothaus
New England (-4) @ Dallas
This just in, both of these teams are undefeated. The Dallas Cowboys are the class of the NFC, yet needed a game winning, clock expiring, 52 yard field goal to beat the lowly Buffalo Bills last week. The number one rule in sports gambling is not to jump off from a team that is winning and covering spreads. The Patriots are 5-0 this year straight-up AND against the spread. Pick: New England
Sara, somehow, includes a Cleveland Brown in her comments between two undefeated teams, “Phil Dawson is old. Dallas would've never won its last game with him. They won't win this one either.” Mr. Normand thinks that Tony Romo can not get any worse. Only time will tell.
NE: Sara, Luke, Devin, Bart, Kevin, Barnes, Grothaus
DAL: Mr. Normand
Oakland @ San Diego (-10)
These games are so bad that I deem it necessary to throw in one of my favorite jokes. “I was down in Georgia last week visiting my buddy’s family. While I was down there my buddy’s kid got caught having sex with his teacher. Well, my first thought was ‘hey good for you kid.’ However I later found out that the kid was home schooled. That was the bad news.” Pick: San Diego
Devin believes that ten is too many points for the Chargers while Mr. Normand sees L.T finally running wild.
OAK: Sara, Devin, Bart, Grothaus
SD: Luke, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Barnes
New Orleans @ Seattle (-7)
“I like an escalator, man, 'cause an escalator can never break. It can only become stairs. There would never be an ‘Escalator Temporarily Out of Order’ sign, only ‘Escalator Temporarily Stairs.’ Sorry for the Convenience." Pick: New Orleans
Hunt sees bad things with his pick, “Will New Orleans ever win?? Probably this week. But I'll take my chances.” When Hunt takes his chances, and they are against my chances, then I really like my chances. Mr. Normand comes through with, “Saints finally said their prayers last week.” I like it. Devin however refuses to pick New Orleans until they win a game.
NO: Sara, Luke, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes
SEA: Grothaus, Devin, Kevin
New York Giants (-3.5) @ Atlanta
This is the Monday Night game? Are you kidding me? Wow. I got nothing but another joke. “I like to wave at people I don't know. It's dangerous to wave to someone you don't know cause what if they don't have a hand? They think you're cocky. Look what I got punk! This thing is useful I'm gonna go pick something up!" Pick: New York Giants
Hunt is dead on with this, “Report: ESPN seeking money from Michael Vick for effectively ruining this Monday Night Football match-up.” Kevin, I would not doubt that this story would go on first before the Indians Game Three win. Devin asks if the Giants could actually be good. The answer to that is that we will never know because the NFC is pathetic at best.
NYG: Sara, Luke, Grothaus, Devin, Mr. Normand
ATL: Bart, Kevin, Barnes
That’s all I got. Best of luck to everyone and GO TRIBE!!!
Congratulations to Bart for winning week four in a tiebreaker over Sara. Week five did not render a double-digit winner but Grothaus was able to win nine games to take home the week. Here are the standings after five weeks.
STANDINGS
1) Sara 40-36 (5-9)
2) Luke 39-37 (7-7)
2) Grothaus 39-37 (9-5)
4) Devin 38-38 (8-6)
5) Mr. Normand 37-39 (3-11)
6) Bart 36-40 (8-6)
7) Kevin 35-41 (5-9)
8) Barnes 33-43 (7-7)
Giddy up.
Cincinnati (-3) @ Kansas City
The Cleveland Indians played a five hour marathon last night in Game Two of the ALCS against the Boston Red Sox. It was a game the Indians had to win. Facing the daunting challenge of having to beat Boston in four out of five games to win the series would have been almost impossible. The Indians managed to split the first two games despite having C.C. Sabathia and Fausto Carmona fail to get out of the fifth inning. The series will be determined at Jacobs Field where the next three games are being played. Whoever wins the majority of games in Cleveland should be in full control to represent the American League in the World Series. Pick: Cincinnati
Hunt, who has a full slate of comments to enjoy this week begins with, “I have no comment on this game. My only thing to say is Happy Birthday to Luke, who turned 22 on Thursday. We may only be getting older, but hey, who isn't these days??” Thanks Hunt for the birthday wishes and for giving me some ammunition to use for one of these crappy games. Mr. Normand picks the Bengals but admits he has no faith in Cincy. Devin meanwhile forecasts a big game for Chad Johnson.
CIN: Luke, Devin, Mr. Normand, Barnes, Grothaus
KC: Sara, Bart, Kevin
Houston @ Jacksonville (-6.5)
Hey, an actual decent game! In all actuality this game could be a lot better if Texan WR Andre Johnson would be playing. This is his fourth straight week he will have missed. The Texans are 1-2 so far without his services. As far as Jacksonville goes they are one Vince Young TD drive away from being 4-0. Don’t look now but this AFC South is suddenly the best conference in football. Six and a half points might be too much for Jacksonville, but until Houston gets completely healthy I’ll take my chances with the Jaguars. Pick: Jacksonville
Hunt wants a short scoring contest, “The Jags D is allowing the second-fewest points per game, so I'm basically hoping it's a 9-3 final. Although, Maurice Jones-Drew might account for the entire spread himself.” Devin decides to take matters to a higher power by flipping a coin.
HOU: Devin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Kevin, Grothaus
JAX: Sara, Luke, Barnes
Miami @ Cleveland (-4.5)
Uh oh. The Browns take the field in a game that they should win. They are playing at home AND facing a winless Dolphin team. Everything points to the Dolphins. However, I liked what I saw last week in New England. The Browns turned the ball over three times and still were only down by ten points with under a minute remaining. That is a good sign. Do you think Cam Cameron would like to have that draft pick back? Pick: Cleveland
Sara follows my line of thinking, “If he hasn't done it already, Cam Cameron should be punching himself in the face at this point for not taking Brady Quinn in this year's draft.” Kevin provides what could have been a great tiebreaker question for this week, “Bonus point should be given to person who can correctly pick the over/under on number of times CBS shows Brady Quinn during the broadcast. My guess: 75.” Hunt, I’m taking your number and adding a 0 to the end of it. Devin goes against one of his rules and picks the Browns and hopes for a big win. Mr. Normand chooses to keep it simple, “Cleveland Rocks!” True story.
MIA: Bart, Barnes
CLE: Sara, Luke, Devin, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Grothaus
Minnesota @ Chicago (-5.5)
I’ve said it before, and I’m sure I will say it again. TAVARIS JACKSON ON THE ROAD!! TAVARIS JACKSON ON THE ROAD!! Pick: Chicago
Hunt feels like I do at the beginning of this post and decides to put a name to this battle, “In what I hope will be a continuing trend, I name this game my Boring Game of the Week. The only thing keeping both teams from running on every down is the fact that Minnesota has the top ranked run defense. So Chicago will have to throw every once in awhile, which, with Brian Griese under center, will probably just mean a lot of incompletions.” Devin believes Chicago is going to go on a roll, while Mr. Normand thinks Kelly Holcomb looks bad at Minnesota too.
MIN: Bart
CHI: Sara, Luke, Devin, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Barnes, Grothaus
Philadelphia (-3) @ New York Jets
Yes, Kevin is correct. I did turn 22 this past Thursday. I really don’t think it has sunk in that I am actually 22 years old. I have a hard time believing that I am older than most of the college football players I watch every Saturday afternoon. Not gonna lie, I only feel like a 17 year old kid. Which I guess isn’t a bad thing. I’m currently putting the over/under on the age where I don’t have to show my ID to buy beer at 35. Pick: Philadelphia
Sara comes up with an interesting way to decide the winner, “I can't think of two quarterbacks with more pressure on them than the ones from these two teams. But Chad Pennington doesn't have chunky soup.” She has a point.
KEVIN’S BALLBUSTER PICK OF THE WEEK (0-4): Philadelphia
“Ballbuster Pick of the Week. At this point, I'm following along the lines of my game comments by trying to think up the most ridiculous things I can. I hope it's working.” And what follows is how Kevin came up with this pick.
“5th game listed, whichever team has a #25 on roster -- if both have one, choose the team whose #25 has a shorter last name. Pick: Philly's Reno Mahe over New York's Kerry Rhodes.” Here’s to hoping Hunt can get that first Ballbuster winning pick.
PHI: Sara, Luke, Devin, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Barnes, Grothaus
NYJ: Bart
St. Louis @ Baltimore (-9.5)
My Dad got me a new basketball hoop for my birthday. Putting up the hoop brought back memories of the day when Dad brought home the very first basketball hoop. I was around the age of six or seven and I remember a bunch of the neighborhood kids came over to help. That first hoop has seen it’s share of basketball shots. I would love to compile a list of all the people who took a shot at that first hoop. Great, great memories. Pick: Baltimore
Hunt says, “A close runner up for Boring Game of the Week.” Mr. Normand has a hard time believing that Baltimore can even score ten points.
STL: Sara, Mr. Normand, Bart, Grothaus
BAL: Luke, Devin “whatever”, Kevin, Barnes
Tennessee @ Tampa Bay (-2.5)
If anyone reading this has not watched “The Office” on NBC then you are missing out tremendously. However there is hope for those of you that have missed the first three episodes of season four. Hit up nbc.com and you can watch every episode online. My favorite character so far this season is Kevin. “You have got to be kidding me.” “I knew it.” Seriously, take some time and watch a couple episodes, you will fall in love just like I did. Pick: Tennessee
Hunt comes through with the quote of the week, “In another new addition to my picks, this is the Maxine Hunt pick of the week. I asked her to pick a number between 1 and 13 - she chose 7 which gives her this game. She took Tampa Bay because she knew their mascot right away. But immediately replied, ‘Although I did remember the Titan name later, so i guess that's where the point spread comes into play.’ This idea instantly turned out to be one of the better investments of my time.” Yes, these are my friends.
TEN: Sara, Luke, Devin, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes, Grothaus
TB: Kevin
Washington @ Green Bay (-3)
Welcome to the battle for the 2nd best team in the NFC. Seriously, these are the contenders. A 40 year old Brett Favre with absolutely no running game against Jason Campbell and Joe Gibbs. Adding fuel to the proverbial fire is the fact that FOX will be televising this game. Awesome. Pick: Washington
Hunt is making the following a reoccurring theme, “Back the Pack 'cause the Pack is back‘ ... this week after letting me down for the first time this year last week.” Does anyone else remember that Brett Favre poster in Mr. Stover’s class? I remember almost losing it when Nick Lay went up there to sharpen his pencil and made sexual gestures towards Favre’s “bulge.” Hilarious.
Devin believes that Green Bay is starting to go downhill while Mr. Normand loves #4.
WAS: Luke, Devin, Bart
GB: Sara, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Barnes, Grothaus
Carolina @ Arizona (-4)
The only thing worse than a David Carr vs. Kurt Warner game is one where you take out David Carr and replace him with Vinny Testaverde. Do you know who the last quarterback was that led the Cleveland Browns to a playoff game victory? The answer, Vinny. You can not make this up. Pick: Arizona
Hunt feels extra creative as he says, “I'll coin the new Kurt Warner descriptor as ‘The Hottest Show in the Desert.’ Since I've essentially copyrighted it, I'll only let people use it at the price of a beer per use. Thanks.” No Kevin, thank you. Mr. Normand sees Kurt Warner returning to his ‘99 form, “Warner comeback continues.”
CAR: Devin, Bart
ARZ: Sara, Luke, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Barnes, Grothaus
New England (-4) @ Dallas
This just in, both of these teams are undefeated. The Dallas Cowboys are the class of the NFC, yet needed a game winning, clock expiring, 52 yard field goal to beat the lowly Buffalo Bills last week. The number one rule in sports gambling is not to jump off from a team that is winning and covering spreads. The Patriots are 5-0 this year straight-up AND against the spread. Pick: New England
Sara, somehow, includes a Cleveland Brown in her comments between two undefeated teams, “Phil Dawson is old. Dallas would've never won its last game with him. They won't win this one either.” Mr. Normand thinks that Tony Romo can not get any worse. Only time will tell.
NE: Sara, Luke, Devin, Bart, Kevin, Barnes, Grothaus
DAL: Mr. Normand
Oakland @ San Diego (-10)
These games are so bad that I deem it necessary to throw in one of my favorite jokes. “I was down in Georgia last week visiting my buddy’s family. While I was down there my buddy’s kid got caught having sex with his teacher. Well, my first thought was ‘hey good for you kid.’ However I later found out that the kid was home schooled. That was the bad news.” Pick: San Diego
Devin believes that ten is too many points for the Chargers while Mr. Normand sees L.T finally running wild.
OAK: Sara, Devin, Bart, Grothaus
SD: Luke, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Barnes
New Orleans @ Seattle (-7)
“I like an escalator, man, 'cause an escalator can never break. It can only become stairs. There would never be an ‘Escalator Temporarily Out of Order’ sign, only ‘Escalator Temporarily Stairs.’ Sorry for the Convenience." Pick: New Orleans
Hunt sees bad things with his pick, “Will New Orleans ever win?? Probably this week. But I'll take my chances.” When Hunt takes his chances, and they are against my chances, then I really like my chances. Mr. Normand comes through with, “Saints finally said their prayers last week.” I like it. Devin however refuses to pick New Orleans until they win a game.
NO: Sara, Luke, Mr. Normand, Bart, Barnes
SEA: Grothaus, Devin, Kevin
New York Giants (-3.5) @ Atlanta
This is the Monday Night game? Are you kidding me? Wow. I got nothing but another joke. “I like to wave at people I don't know. It's dangerous to wave to someone you don't know cause what if they don't have a hand? They think you're cocky. Look what I got punk! This thing is useful I'm gonna go pick something up!" Pick: New York Giants
Hunt is dead on with this, “Report: ESPN seeking money from Michael Vick for effectively ruining this Monday Night Football match-up.” Kevin, I would not doubt that this story would go on first before the Indians Game Three win. Devin asks if the Giants could actually be good. The answer to that is that we will never know because the NFC is pathetic at best.
NYG: Sara, Luke, Grothaus, Devin, Mr. Normand
ATL: Bart, Kevin, Barnes
That’s all I got. Best of luck to everyone and GO TRIBE!!!
Sunday, October 07, 2007
2007 NFL Picks Week Five
First things first, I must apologize to everyone for the hurried and abbreviated column this week. Simply put, I had way too much fun in Cleveland the past couple of days. Look for a post in the middle of the week about the Indians and the rest of the MLB Playoffs. Also, I apologize to those who were looking for me this past weekend in Athens. The plan was to come down after Friday's Game Two @ Jacobs Field. Didn't quite make it down to Ohio U. To be perfectly honest I didn't feel like driving all the way back to Tiffin (which I did due to Grothaus riding along with me) and then waking up Saturday to drive all the way to Athens. On top of that, Grothaus and I decided to stay in Cleveland a bit longer Friday night to celebrate what was the best sporting event we both had ever seen. So, apologies for my absence from Athens and for this short post. On to the picks.
I also have to apologize for those who made comments this week. Sorry for not including them in this post. Not gonna lie, it's noon, and I want to get this done before the games start. Kudos to Bart and Sara last week for having the only pair of winning records. They both went 8-6 which gives Sara the overall lead by one game and brings Bart out of the cellar. The tiebreaker question this week for Bart and Sara was "How many incomplete passes will Tom Brady throw this week?" The person who guessed the closest, without going over (Price Is Right style) would be declared the week four winner (means absolutely nothing). Note, in the case that they both go over, whoever was the closest originally would win. Sara said five while Bart went with nine. Best of luck.
STANDINGS
1) Sara 35-27 (8-6)
2) Mr. Normand 34-28 (7-7)
3) Luke 32-30 (7-7)
4) Devin 30-32 (4-10)
4) Grothaus 30-32 (5-9)
4) Kevin 30-32 (6-8)
7) Bart 28-34 (8-6)
8) Barnes 26-35 (4-10)
On to the week five picks.
Carolina @ New Orleans (-3)
CAR: Grothaus, Bart
NO: Sara, Mr. Normand, Luke, Devin, Kevin, Barnes
Jacksonville (-2.5) @ Kansas City
JAX: Luke, Devin, Grothaus, Barnes
KC: Sara, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Bart
Detroit @ Washington (-3.5)
DET: Sara, Mr. Normand, Devin, Grothaus, Bart, Barnes
WAS: Luke, Kevin
Atlanta @ Tennessee (-8.5)
ATL: Sara, Luke, Devin, Grothaus, Bart
TEN: Mr. Normand, Kevin, Barnes
Miami @ Houston (-5.5)
MIA: Luke, Bart
HOU: Sara, Mr. Normand, Devin, Grothaus, Kevin, Barnes
Seattle @ Pittsburgh (-6)
SEA: Luke, Bart
PIT: Sara, Mr. Normand, Devin, Grothaus, Kevin, Barnes
Cleveland @ New England (-14.5)
CLE: Sara, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Bart
NE: Luke, Devin, Grothaus, Barnes
Arizona (-3.5) @ St. Louis
ARI: Sara, Mr. Normand, Luke, Kevin, Barnes
STL: Devin, Grothaus, Bart
New York Jets @ New York Giants (-3)
NYJ: Mr. Normand, Luke, Bart
NYG: Sara, Devin, Grothaus, Kevin, Barnes
Tampa Bay @ Indianapolis (-10)
TB: Luke, Bart
IND: Sara, Mr. Normand, Devin, Grothaus, Kevin, Barnes
San Diego @ Denver (-1)
SD: Sara, Devin, Grothaus, Bart, Barnes
DEN: Mr. Normand, Luke, Kevin's Ballbuster Pick of the Week (0-3)
Baltimore (-3.5) @ San Francisco
BAL: Sara, Mr. Normand, Luke, Devin, Grothaus, Kevin
SF: Bart, Barnes
Chicago @ Green Bay (-3)
CHI: Luke, Grothaus, Bart
GB: Sara, Mr. Normand, Devin, Kevin, Barnes
Dallas (-10) @ Buffalo
DAL: Sara, Devin, Grothaus, Barnes
BUF: Mr. Normand, Luke, Kevin, Bart
So there are the picks for this week. I already have too many "I'm sorries" in this post so I will not be ending with any more. Best of luck to everyone this week and GO TRIBE!!
I also have to apologize for those who made comments this week. Sorry for not including them in this post. Not gonna lie, it's noon, and I want to get this done before the games start. Kudos to Bart and Sara last week for having the only pair of winning records. They both went 8-6 which gives Sara the overall lead by one game and brings Bart out of the cellar. The tiebreaker question this week for Bart and Sara was "How many incomplete passes will Tom Brady throw this week?" The person who guessed the closest, without going over (Price Is Right style) would be declared the week four winner (means absolutely nothing). Note, in the case that they both go over, whoever was the closest originally would win. Sara said five while Bart went with nine. Best of luck.
STANDINGS
1) Sara 35-27 (8-6)
2) Mr. Normand 34-28 (7-7)
3) Luke 32-30 (7-7)
4) Devin 30-32 (4-10)
4) Grothaus 30-32 (5-9)
4) Kevin 30-32 (6-8)
7) Bart 28-34 (8-6)
8) Barnes 26-35 (4-10)
On to the week five picks.
Carolina @ New Orleans (-3)
CAR: Grothaus, Bart
NO: Sara, Mr. Normand, Luke, Devin, Kevin, Barnes
Jacksonville (-2.5) @ Kansas City
JAX: Luke, Devin, Grothaus, Barnes
KC: Sara, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Bart
Detroit @ Washington (-3.5)
DET: Sara, Mr. Normand, Devin, Grothaus, Bart, Barnes
WAS: Luke, Kevin
Atlanta @ Tennessee (-8.5)
ATL: Sara, Luke, Devin, Grothaus, Bart
TEN: Mr. Normand, Kevin, Barnes
Miami @ Houston (-5.5)
MIA: Luke, Bart
HOU: Sara, Mr. Normand, Devin, Grothaus, Kevin, Barnes
Seattle @ Pittsburgh (-6)
SEA: Luke, Bart
PIT: Sara, Mr. Normand, Devin, Grothaus, Kevin, Barnes
Cleveland @ New England (-14.5)
CLE: Sara, Mr. Normand, Kevin, Bart
NE: Luke, Devin, Grothaus, Barnes
Arizona (-3.5) @ St. Louis
ARI: Sara, Mr. Normand, Luke, Kevin, Barnes
STL: Devin, Grothaus, Bart
New York Jets @ New York Giants (-3)
NYJ: Mr. Normand, Luke, Bart
NYG: Sara, Devin, Grothaus, Kevin, Barnes
Tampa Bay @ Indianapolis (-10)
TB: Luke, Bart
IND: Sara, Mr. Normand, Devin, Grothaus, Kevin, Barnes
San Diego @ Denver (-1)
SD: Sara, Devin, Grothaus, Bart, Barnes
DEN: Mr. Normand, Luke, Kevin's Ballbuster Pick of the Week (0-3)
Baltimore (-3.5) @ San Francisco
BAL: Sara, Mr. Normand, Luke, Devin, Grothaus, Kevin
SF: Bart, Barnes
Chicago @ Green Bay (-3)
CHI: Luke, Grothaus, Bart
GB: Sara, Mr. Normand, Devin, Kevin, Barnes
Dallas (-10) @ Buffalo
DAL: Sara, Devin, Grothaus, Barnes
BUF: Mr. Normand, Luke, Kevin, Bart
So there are the picks for this week. I already have too many "I'm sorries" in this post so I will not be ending with any more. Best of luck to everyone this week and GO TRIBE!!
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