2009 F'd Up Tourney: LIVE BLOGGING THE FIRST ROUND (Part One)

By: Luke Florence

Welcome to the live running blog of the 1st Round Mainstay Matchups. Kevin and I are sitting in the friendly confines of Madison, WI as we begin on this epic journey.

Here is how you can follow along.

We will be rolling these match-ups in order just as they appear. Next to the match-up you will find the estimated start time, the half-time score, and eventually the final score. If there are any memorable moments, or AND ONE possibilities, we will let you know.

All times are EST. We will break for dinner at 7:40 PM EST, and be back with the second half ... if we are still alive.

And here ... we ... go.

29) Bob Seger vs. 100) November 31st - 5:00 PM - Okay, we are off. Winner of this contest gets the winner of Adam Sandler-Little Hugo's. Giddy up. It's finally happening.

40-36 Nov. 31st at half

72-72 - WE ARE GOING TO OVERTIME ... god help us

85-83 IN OVERTIME ... the winner NOVEMBER 31ST

47) Hot Nuts vs. 82) Gino Toretta - 5:05 PM

44-38 - for old Mr. Toretta at half.

Toretta stumbles at the end, and loses 84-80 to Hot Nuts.

10) Do With This As You Will vs. 119) Omar Vizquel/Carlos Baerga - 5:10 PM

47-41 - DWTAUW up.

The tag team duo storms out of the gates, wins it on the last roll ... 82-78 Vizquel/Baerga.

63) Giddy Up vs. 66) Will Ferrell - 5:15 PM

39-37 Ferrell at half.

Ferrell stays ahead the entire 2nd half, and semi-cruises to a 79-70 win.

3) Power/Man In The Starter Sweatshirt vs. 126) Family Guy - 5:20 PM

40-37 at half in favor for Power ... Family Guy lucky to be this close.

Family Guy holds off a final double roll ... and wins by one ... 75-74.

35) Ballbuster Pick Of The Week vs. 94) Looper-Olson - 5:25 PM

Looper/Olson rolls double 6's ... adds a 6 ... and then finishes with a 5 ... for a roll of 23!!

That's why it's called the F'd Up Tourney. Looper/Olson up 60-44 at half.

Looper/Olson posts the highest recorded score in history, as they pummel the ballbuster ... 113-92 ... defense was at a premium.

2) FAN-tastic vs. 127) Don't Be Stupid - 5:30 PM

44-41 Don't Be Stupid up at the half ... winner gets Will Ferrell in the 2nd Round.

(Brief intermission while Kevin explains the rules to Shane Kline, who is an automatic qualifier for winning our fantasy football league)

74-69 ... Don't Be Stupid takes it ... Ballbuster Pick of the Week is fuming ... and we have our first 2nd round matchup finalized ... Don't Be Stupid vs. Will Ferrell.

32) Gay Lanes vs. 97) O.U.I.M. - 5:35 PM

41-29 Gay Lanes at half.

Gay Lanes holds off a furious OUIM challenge, and take it 86-80, by rolling a 16 on their last turn.

52) BBG vs. 77) Merkt's Cheese - 5:40 PM

45-30 at half for the Wisconsin cheese.

97-63 for Merkt's Cheese, the biggest win thus far ... and incredibly, we are on schedule.

13) Stuart Appleby vs. 116) The Pin-Pals - 5:45 PM

41-40 for the golfer ... you know he is sitting on the edge of his seat ... winner gets Merkt's Cheese, who actually stayed around to see how this one would play out.

Appleby stretches his lead throughout the 2nd half ... and wins ... 80-68 ... he gets Merkt's next.

37) WHEI In The Mornings/Maxine Monday's vs. 92) Taco John's - 5:50 PM

We are tied at 49 at half ... oh billy.

Taco John's upended 93-82 ... as Maxine Monday's lives to fight another day.

6) Cleveland Indians vs. 123) Unappreciative Bastard "Vince Carter" - 5:55 PM

38-36 for Mr. Carter at half ... can the Indians salvage out of this season??

Berry Wood blows the save ... and we are headed to extra innings ... 71-71.

The Indians bullpen implodes yet again ... as they get smoked 94-77 in OT.

19) The Applebee's Commercial vs. 110) The Promise - 6:00 PM

The Promise trails 41-34 at half ... as Bob Seger sorrowfully plays on in the background, even though he was the first person eliminated in this entire tournament.

But just when you think The Promise is out ... it pulls himself back in ... 76-73 The Promise advances.

14) Awful vs. 115) Brad Bursa - 6:05 PM

41-35 for our good friend Bursa as he tries to upset the 2006 #1 seed.

78-67 ... BURRRRRRRSSSAAAA ... he will take the winner of Chris Farley/Trainwreck.

22) McHappy's vs. 107) Little Tikes Hoop - 6:10 PM

41-29 for the 24 hour doughnut shop.

McHappy's dominates from the on-set, and wins 87-67.

18) St. Mary's Elementary vs. 111) Jimmy V - 6:15 PM

42-34 ... Never Give Up.

87-79 ... again ... NEVER GIVE UP ... Jimmy V is alive (sort of). Hot Nuts await in the 2nd round (that's what she said).

15) Ronald Pittman vs. 114) Anchorman - 6:20 PM

42-33 at half, in favor of Pittman.

85-71, as Pittman knocks off Anchorman ... how many of your brackets are just ruined now??

25) New against Old Browns Beer Pong vs. 104) Asian Invasion - 6:25 PM

60-44 in favor of the browns beer-pong ... in two rules they rolled 32 ... ONIONS!!

In a beat-down reminiscent of the Browns' glory days (which were when exactly??) ... they send the Asian Invasion back home ... winning 104-76.

41) Reach vs. 88) Mel Kiper III/T.Willy - 6:30 PM

41-40 for Reach ... Kevin really hopes T.Willy comes up with the win.

T.Willy needs a 10 to send it to OT, but rolls a 9 ... losing by one ... 80-79 ... one for the ages.

8) George Costanza vs. 121) Mrs. Hughes' French Class - 6:35 PM

And yes ... Kevin is rolling for George ... no question about it.

30-29 at half for Mrs. Hughes ... dial up the opposite.

Tied at 64 after nine rolls, George eeks out the win ... 71-67.

24) John Chaney vs. 105) Sweet Franklin - 6:40 PM

Sweet Franklin loves the double 4's ... up 52-40 at half.

John Cheney is unable to make any half-time adjustments, and loses 91-76, as the 2nd Wade Peery expression advances. Up next for Sweet Franklin will be Reach.

53) J-RO vs. 76) Paul Culver - 6:45 PM

The General leads it 38-35 at half.

Culver takes it rather easily ... 82-65.

16) Lieutenant Dan vs. 113) Ohio University - 6:50 PM

The institution rolls three doubles and takes a 40-35 lead half-way through.

78-61 as Lt.Dan looks miserable in action ... OU moves on.

36) Adam Sandler vs. 93) Little Hugo's - 6:55 PM

Winner gets November 31st.

37-30 Sandler at the half. Advantage Nov. 31st.

Little Hugo's makes up some ground, completes the comeback and advances 85-80 over Sandler.

20) K.E.L.E.R. vs. 109) Mansfield! - 7:00 PM

Mansfield! takes the half-time lead 34-33 in a barn-burner.

On the strength of a 28 point roll ... KELER takes it 90-74.

23) Keith Hodkinson vs. 106) Erik "Guss" Huss - 7:05 PM

48-39 for Kevin's least-favorite broadcaster ... ever.

Guss makes a valiant effort ... ties it at 74 with one roll to go ... needs a 6 to tie ... but rolls a 5 ... Keith Hodkinson gets the winner of Lesbians and Tim Couch ... 80-79.

61) Planes, Trains and Automobiles vs. 68) Randy Hunt "Rub Money" - 7:10 PM

35-32 for Randy ... can John Candy and Steve Martin comeback??

Randy wins an offensive struggle ... 71-62 ... The Rub Money is alive.

34) Jay Bilas "Strong" vs. 95) John Daly - 7:15 PM

50-33 for JD ... it's got to be the pants.

Jay Bilas was quite "weak" in this match-up ... JD walks on ... 84-66.

54) Bromley 310 vs. 75) Tom Hodson - 7:20 PM

Hodson, on the strength of a 17 point turn ... takes the half-time lead 44-42.

But Bromley 310 storms out of the gate in the 2nd half and cruises to a 93-74 victory. The Matt Barnes/Tom Hamilton winner awaits.

43) Memorial Day Weekend vs. 86) Ten Things I Hate About You - 7:25 PM

Winner gets McHappy's.

45-36 for Memorial Day Weekend ... the rolling committee is quite pleased with this results so far.

78-64 for MDW ... thank god.

26) The Ceiling Bracket vs. 103) Route 56/Hollerback Girl - 7:30 PM

48-32 for the ever immortal Ceiling Bracket ... again, the rolling committee is in good spirits.

In the biggest comeback victory we have had yet ... Route 56 rolls a 15 and then an 11 to win by one ... unreal ... 81-80.

12) Keystone Light vs. 117) Rudy - 7:35 PM

36-34 for the little guy at half.

73-70 for Rudy ... and guess what awaits him ... none other than the legendary Paul Culver.