Romeo's Letter to Brady

I have to credit some of my "inside" sources for finding this gem. Apparently, this is a letter that Cleveland Browns Head Coach Romeo Crennel wrote to Brady Quinn following Sunday's win against the Cincinnati Bengals.

I asked this source - who shall remain nameless - why Crennel spent time writing out the letter, when he could have just sent an e-mail or called Brady on the cell. The answer didn't surprise me.

"Romeo doesn't know how to use any of that stuff. His only form of active communication in the office is a rotary phone, which is practically useless because his fingers have been too fat to dial for quite some time. Thankfully, he has a deal with Donatos where they call HIM every hour to see if he needs anything. He usually does."

I should have known better.

This letter helps answers the question as to why Brady has not yet seen any action as well as hinting at the future of the Browns as an organization.

Here ya go, enjoy.

"Dear 'The Other Guy,'

Before I get into why I am writing you this letter, I want to apologize for the BBQ stains on the edges of the paper. I just got done with my 10 AM snack, but apparently did not do a sufficient job of licking my fingers. This should come as no surprise to you however, as we have shaken hands many times. I hope your girlfriend forgives me for the 'chicken wings' incident several months back. I thought she was reaching for my food, and had no idea she just needed a tissue. Hopefully the swelling has gone down a considerable amount.

I'm sure you were quite disappointed in not getting any playing time against the Bengals yesterday. I had promised that you would see the field if DA struggled, and when he did, I still didn't put you in. Well, the first thing I would like to say is that you have to tell me you want to play. I mean, I can't think of everything. Next time, just tell me you're around and want to get in. As you know, I forget things from time to time. Like when to call timeouts. It's exhausting trying to remember all of those things.

However, even if you would have come up to me during halftime and asked to go in, I would have said no. You see, I don't make the decisions when it comes to personnel on this team. That comes from Phil Savage. I have no say whatsoever. Phil is under the impression that DA can still become a good quarterback. He wants DA to become his Tom Brady and wants to give him every opportunity possible. It's why Charlie Frye was traded. It's why he low-balled you on your contract, forcing you to hold out so DA could get a chance. Let's face it, if you would have been in camp on time last year, you probably would have forced Phil to trade Frye before week one, and as a result, you would have started week two against the Bengals.

In Phil's perfect world, DA is our quarterback and you are traded away. Phil knows that you are more valuable out there on the open market. Think of all the teams you would be STARTING for right NOW. The Vikings, Ravens, Dolphins, Jaguars, Chiefs, and Buccaneers to name a few. If you were traded to those places tomorrow, you would be starting. No questions asked.

See, Phil wants to milk that by not playing you at all. You would be the giant "unknown." One with limitless potential. A team might overpay for you, and Phil would look like a genius. I know it's been your dream to play for the Browns and that this team needs more people like yourself, who honestly care about Cleveland (unlike Mr. James), because that will ultimately lead us to where we want to go. However, Phil doesn't care about any of that. He needs DA to play well so he can convince Randy Lerner to allow for a trade involving you, one that will be too good to pass up.
Wait till you hear Phil's press conference tomorrow. It will be a walking contradiction of everything he has preached the previous three years. He will talk about how you have to let the people who got us into trouble a chance to get us out of it. Don't believe a word of it kid. This is the same Phil Savage who traded away Charlie Frye last year after ONE WEEK. The reality is that he loves DA and the only reason he even traded for you last year was to buy him more time. He didn't expect us to go 10-6, and he wanted some insurance if we went 4-12 or something along those lines. If you were on the team, then he could talk about "future" stuff, and get him an extra year or two from Lerner, who as you know, really wanted to draft you at #3.

Phil and I have never seen eye-to-eye on draft day. A few years ago I wanted to take Haloti Ngata from Oregon. His presence as a defensive nose tackle would have fit perfectly in my 3-4 defense. What did we do instead? We traded down, let the Ravens draft Ngata and took Kamerion Wimbley instead. Wimbley, a DE at Florida State, was going to become a LB for us. Phil thought it could work out. You tell me if he was right (he was not). Instead, Phil finally realized that I really needed a dominant defensive tackle so he traded away our best cornerback and a third-round draft pick for Shaun Rogers. If we would have had Ngata, we wouldn't have needed Rogers. This is just Phil backtracking, hoping to look good with his pricey free-agent signings.

Look, I know you are the better QB. The more mobile. The more accurate. The one that gives us the best chance to win. The players know that too. Braylon Edwards and Kellen Winslow both really want to see you out there. They realize that you will help them get their stats, get their money, and maybe more importantly, get them in the playoffs. That is why they are so frustrated. QB controversies hurt not just the two quarterbacks, but the entire team. DA is a nice guy, but he's nothing more than a good back-up.

But throughout my 61 years of life, I've realized that everyone has to report to a boss. Like him or hate him, you still have to report to him. I don't want to get fired. I would lose my Donatos deal.

So hang in there. Maybe DA will get hurt and Ken Dorsey will get sick, then you will be the guy. I give you so much credit for being the bigger person in all of this mess. For saying the right things, for not making this into more of a problem. This shows the leadership and poise you would bring to the huddle, if Phil would ever let you get there.

Okay, I better get going. Enjoy the bye week. Tell big old Charlie Weis that I think I can take him in a foot race now. Well, there's the phone. Should I get more chicken wings or an extra-large pizza? Who am I kidding? I'll get both.

Your coach, Romeo"

Wow, that had some compelling material. Who would have thought there was that much friction between Romeo and Phil. It makes sense because if the Browns keep losing, Romeo will be the first to go, not Phil. Also, Phil does seem to get too involved in day-to-day decisions, especially involving who is playing.

There is this myth that Phil, and Romeo for that matter, are trying to portray about rookie quarterbacks needing time to learn the system. With the way Matt Ryan and Joe Flacco are playing this year, it's obvious that a mass generalization of "rookie QBs" is absurd. Let's be real. If Brady was in this year's draft, he would have been taken above both of those guys.

The other argument is that they don't want Brady to turn into a Tim Couch. That is not a way to run a professional franchise, being scared from the past. Brady Quinn is not Tim Couch, he's not Ryan Leaf, he's not Peyton Manning. He's Brady Quinn. Case closed.

Who knows what will happen down the road. Through these first four games, it's obvious to me someone needs to go. If it's Brady, then I will seriously think about switching teams. I'm dead serious. It would be a monumental move for me, but if he gets traded, and they stick with DA, I would switch. Just giving everyone a heads up.

Phil messed up by signing DA to a three-year contract. The correct move was a one-year tender. If another team would have wanted him, we would have gotten their first and third round draft picks. Phil said he didn't want those picks to be low in each round, say in the mid-twenties. What a load of crap. Don't buy that for a second. A first round pick is still a first round pick. AND, the Browns didn't have one to begin with, so it would have made perfect sense. If no team would have signed him, then we don't have too much invested in him, and it gives us some insurance in case he continued to struggle, which he is.

Now, Phil has devalued DA to the point where I'm not sure we can get more than a third OR a fourth round pick for him. Last year it would have been a first AND a third. Phil pulled a Braylon Edwards on this one and clearly dropped the ball.

Regardless, I was pleasantly surprised to receive that letter today, and hopefully down the road there will be more to come. Let me know what you guys think of this, and what you would like me to ask my "inside" sources to find.

Until next time, "read it, roll it, hole it."