For some reason I completely forgot to post Jason Fazzone's Week Ten Column, so what follows is his forgotten special section. At the end of his post I will make some comments. Enjoy and apologies to Fiz for being two weeks behind on his special sections.
IN THE ZONE - Vol. I - Num. IX
My apologies for not putting out a section this past week – I was enjoying the wonderful city of Denver. For not having a car, we still had a good time, taking in an Avalanche game (more to come on that), taking a tour of Coors Field and being at the Steelers/Broncos Monday night game. And now, onto what I’ve been thinking about lately:
The highlight of Denver (besides the Steelers win): My friend Mike Dubz and I had nothing to do Sunday night, so we figured we’d go to the Colorado Avalanche/Edmonton Oilers game. For $55 apiece, we got club seats that were located behind the net. While we were waiting at a bar near the Pepsi Center for the guy to meet us to give us our tickets, Dubz started talking to a guy from Montreal who was also in Denver for the Steelers/Broncos game. This guy asked Dubz if we were going to the game, and after Dubz said yes, invited both of us into his suite.
Dubz gave him his number, but we figured this guy was just pulling our leg. Not even 10 minutes after getting into our actual seats, this guy called us and invited us over.
As it turns out, this guy and five of his buddies (all from Montreal) rented a 20-person suite for the game. They went to bars and invited random people they met to join them. Hands down, it was the rowdiest suite I’ve ever been in. We were getting drunk off free beer and Grey Goose and ate some free food – fantastic. The Oilers won, 5-3, and we ripped on the Avs fans as they were walking out of the building, which was all in good fun.
So we return to our hotel, and we run into these guys again, and they happened to be staying in the same hotel. It was the six Canadians, me, Dubz and a young couple from New Mexico at one of the tables and it was just a big ripfest. During this time, one of the Canadians lifts his hat, and in the middle of this open area, hands the kid from New Mexico a joint.
After that, and hearing the story in which they spent over $10,000 in airfare just to get to Denver, Dubz and I firmly believe that we partied with Canadian drug dealers. Nothing else explains it.
Places to go in Denver: Coyote Ugly was pretty cool – just ignore the old guys assembled around the bar and drooling over the bartenders. The girls were hot, but this one had the fakest breasts I’ve ever seen in my life. They didn’t even flinch while she danced. Other than that, Katie Mullen’s is a good place to eat and drink, Earls’ waitresses are smoking hot, and The Delectable Egg has great breakfast food (and I never eat breakfast). Now, to non-Denver material:
Dubz is never making another pick for me: I collaborated with him for last week’s picks, since he was on a roll betting games. The result was a 3-10 week. Awesome.
But, believe in miracles: Somehow, some way, I will come back to at least get close to the money, if not in it by the end of the season.
Steelers will win: No way in hell Cincinnati comes into Heinz Field and replicates what it pulled off earlier this season. The Steelers have played at another level the past few weeks, thanks to Troy Polamalu being back.
Jay Cutler: I hope you burn in hell.
NBA Coach of the Year: Apparently, it’s not good to win this award. Avery Johnson, Sam Mitchell and now Byron Scott have all been canned in at least two years after winning the award. Hey, Mike Brown, guess what happens if you don’t win a title and LeBron leaves?
Pink suitcases: I just saw Eric Maynor and Wesley Matthews carrying pink fairytale suitcases into the Q for the Cavaliers/Jazz game. Kinda reminded me of Polito’s “soft hour,” when he would eat fruit cups and listen to NSync, the Backstreet Boys and Savage Garden.
Jillian Reynolds: I miss you on Fox’s pregame show. Please bring you and your large breasts back ASAP.
I hate this: There was something I wanted to put in this column, but I can’t remember it.
USC/Notre Dame: Two things have happened twice in the past three seasons: Navy beating Notre Dame and Stanford beating USC. That gets an “LOL” from me.
Poland football: Poland Seminary plays Cardinal Mooney in the Division III, Region 9 championship Friday night. I can’t wait to see how many fights break out in the stands.
New job: I start my new job Monday; can’t wait to make the hour-long commute to and from Akron while waiting to move out.
Projected AFC playoff teams: Patriots, Steelers, Colts, Chargers (division champs); Bengals and Broncos
Last AFC team out: Texans
Projected NFC playoff teams: Eagles, Vikings, Saints, Cardinals (division champs); Cowboys and Packers
Last NFC team out: Falcons
Super Bowl XLIV: Steelers over Vikings
As always, until next time, go Steelers!
_______________________________________________________________First things first Fiz ... you DID party with Canadian drug dealers. No question about it.
Second, the Cleveland Browns have better chances of making the playoffs then you do of coming close to winning money in this league. Sorry to burst that bubble. Better to accept it now and start planning for 2010.
Third, the highlight of this column was Polito's soft-hour. Brilliant.
Fourth, the Denver Broncos have no shot of making the playoffs. None.
Lastly, right now the Pittsburgh Steelers are probably the fifth - or sixth - best team in the AFC. Good luck with that Super Bowl prediction.
Overall, a solid column, even if it did paint a weird picture of Fiz getting all googly-eyes over anyone with breasts. Keep 'em coming.
Until next time, "read it, roll it, hole it."
No comments:
Post a Comment